kgautreaux/blog: RSS

24 Weeks

2011-09-14T10:59:00-05:00

We call this one the terminator view. "Come with me if you want to live."

The hospital is demoing new ultrasounds and Shaleah was the first guinea pig.

Failure

2011-09-03T15:17:00-05:00

I think one of the most difficult adjustments to make as an adult is becoming comfortable with failure. As kids, failure is, for all practical purposes, not an option. Failure is held up as a spectre to be avoided at all costs. Mediocrity, of course, is not. A grade of "D-" is not failure, only a grade of "F" is failure. I'm still unclear about "F+".

As an adult, however, failure is a constant companion. No one is going to laud your accomplishment of performing your job competently, or admire you for picking up your dirty clothes. Most jobs, most lives, are filled with the narrow avoidance of catastrophe. There are very few true successes. So few, in fact that it is not unusual to look back on the end of a year and not be able to name one. You can adjust your expectations downward and create successes. If you haven't been fired in the last few years or if you have not given up seeking gainful employment within the last twelve months you might consider that a success, but by any objective measure you're the one-eyed king and all your subjects are walking into the walls.

The thing about failure, though, is that it is incredibly liberating. Once failure is always an option the fear of failure disappears, but I worry that if failure is standard operating procedure we become mired in a situation where we made the weather and then (we) stand in the rain and say, "Shit! It's rainin'!"

This week I've had several failures. Most of these have been medical failures, which I can't technically write about. It is often said, "an expert is someone who has made all possible mistakes in a narrow field." After seven years of practicing medicine you might think the rate of mistakes would decrease, but I postulate that it is impossible to become an expert in primary care because it does not satisfy the second requirement of the maxim. It also occurs to me that making the same mistake multiple times is a real loophole.

So, I'll recount a failure in the home. All homeowners know that "the universe tends towards entropy." If a particular part of your house is not worn down or broken it is only because it is currently engaged in the process of breaking. This week I found out that the shingles on our house are defective but there is no way to have them replaced under warranty. The reason they are defective is that these shingles were designed to degrade more quickly in a landfill. Logically, that means they would also degrade more quickly on your roof, but apparently that wasn't taken into account during manufacturing of these shingles. Failure rears its ugly, misshapen head again. Sure enough, shortly after being put in to production the shingles began to degrade quickly on the roof, but for reasons that are unclear they weren't actually recalled. Thus, we are stuck with degrading shingles but would have to pay for the cost of replacement unless we have a hail storm within the next three years.

If you work your way down slightly from the roof you might meet our bat habitat. Don't ask me how I know this, but suffice to say that it involved a flashlight, a hazmat suit of my own design, and a thirty minute attic expedition where I discovered that the wall slats behind our chimney aren't sealed and provide a nice area for bats to roost between the chimney and the wall. From here they can make excursions into the attic, and on a few occaisions some have become disoriented and have flown into the house instead.

The fix is not complicated, and I have a plan, but this is where we get to the disheartening part of the story, because if things weren't bad enough it was the correction of a previous failure that resulted in the larger failure of bat infestation. Last winter we had an energy audit and the company that performed this audit noted that the insulation in the attic was all piled up against the attic wall rather than spread out over the floor of the attic. They dutifully replaced the insulation and added some additional insulation but the act of removing the insulation that was piled up against the attic wall resulted in exposure of these cracks.

Failure, it seems, not only permeates our very existence, but also lies in wait to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory.

Addendum: A few days after this was posted I broke my nose playing basketball. A fitting capper to a horrible week.

20 Weeks

2011-08-14T20:37:00-05:00

Today you have been gestating for 20 weeks. Where does the time go? It seems like just yesterday you were a fetal pole. Anyway, I digress.

You're halfway to 40 weeks, but I would be thrilled if you would just stay put until 36 or 37 weeks. No use rushing out the door. And not that you would take my advice, but don't give your mother so much grief.

Ha, very astute. I do sound like a Jewish grandmother, but your vicious verbal barbs do not phase me. Now, eat something! You're skin and bones!

Weekly Recap

This was a big week for your uncle Jeffrey. He started his new job at Wernham-Hogg. Don't worry, you'll get that joke later when I force you both to watch The Office. Actually, he is working for a law firm in Prescott, AZ. They specialize in real estate law. He even has his own business cards. What...? Oh, they're like small pieces of card stock that you put your name and contact information on so you can give them to people who need to contact you. No, it's like thick sturdy paper. What? Yes, well it's something you write on that is made from wood pulp...I'll explain trees later. Anyway, you'll hear some things about lawyers later, but don't worry, your uncle is a good one. What's that? Ha ha, no he's not dead. How is it that you know all these lawyer jokes but you don't know what trees are? Nevermind...

Your cousins Ada and Anchor are also doing well. We saw them both this week via the wonder of the internet! That? It's just a voice I use when I want to be dramatic. No, it's not Paul Lynde, it's more like Ian McKellan. Yes, they are, but one has a much more impressive voice. Well, I disagree! Fine, I'll stop.

I often wonder what it would be like to grow up being able to see your cousin at anytime via the wonders of video chat? In my day if we wanted to see our cousins we had to drive 14 hours to another part of the United States. No, not through the snow! Well if it wasn't for us you wouldn't even have holographic chatrooms. Yes, I wrote this on a computer. No, I don't have the punch-cards to prove it. Stop snickering.

Your uncle Elliott is still in Afghanistan flying Predator drones. Oh, so you know what those are...excuse me for assuming. You will be going to his wedding, but you'll be 26 weeks then. Oh, right, I forgot you can't see. Yes, of course I'll take plenty of pictures.

Last, but not least this week your mother took you flying, twice, in the Cessna 152. I'm sure you enjoyed it.

Be good.

Hibiscus

2011-08-07T18:52:00-05:00

Here we have a picture of Shaleah's amazing hibiscus plant. So far in August we've had several blooms every day. It is the prettiest part of the backyard.

Don't pay any attention to the other parts of the backyard, they are decidedly less pretty. Now that it isn't 96 degrees fahrenheit with 97% humidity every day we occaisionally eat lunch out on the back patio. The splash of color really brightens your day.

Sisters

2011-08-04T12:37:00-05:00

On wednesday this week we found out with relative certainty that the twins are both girls. So they'll each have a sister. Never having known what it is like to have a sister I can't help them much with guidance, but if it is anything like having brothers I'm sure they'll fight all the time and be best friends.

I asked Shaleah what it was like to have a sister and she said it was great so I'm optimistic that they'll love each other. Neither of us knows what it is like to have a twin sister so I'm almost certain they will develop some creepy twin language that Shaleah and I won't be able to decifer.

In the above video you can get a general idea of Baby A on the right and Baby B on the left. It might be hard to tell, but they are trying to kick each other through the amniotic membrane that separates them. Like I said....Love!

I've Got to Start Writing This Down

2011-07-29T08:46:00-05:00

You'll have to forgive me. I've recently fallen prey to an overwhelming urge to document the events surrounding Shaleah's pregnancy. I suspect there is at least an 80% chance that our offspring won't care at all what their parents lives were like before they arrived. I'm not harboring illusions about that. But I believe that eventually they might be very interested in the parts of their lives that they can't remember. Childhood memories are a funny thing. I seem to have very few compared to most people I talk to. I'm not sure why that is. Probably it's because my childhood was relatively idyllic and filled mostly with endless days of imagining myself to be a famous fighter pilot.

The impetus for this explosion of verbosity, and what I hope to make my habit of writing down what I see, feel, and think, was this post. Something like that is what I aspire to with this, and even if it only ends up as a treasure map for a trip down memory lane thirty years hence I will have succeeded beyond expectations.

Hi there. Thanks for coming, but this is not here for you. Feel free to read it. I'd be happy if you got a chuckle or a smile from the things that go here, but this is here for me. This is here to remind me of what it felt like at the time. I need an anchor for things that I want to remember because my memory is fallible.

Address to future me

Isn't this fun? How does scrolling work in your time? Right now we are all struggling with the transition from scrolling in Mac OS X Snow Leopard to scrolling in Mac OS X Lion. Good times. How is the debt ceiling in your time? Have they abolished it? Does it function in any capacity? We're struggling with that now too, but isn't it funny that I mentioned trackpad scrolling in an operating system before the debt ceiling debacle. Remember priorities?

I suppose you are probably pretty busy with taking care of the twins. What are they like? The future is such a mystery from back here. Remember when you and Shaleah drove to Arnold, NE to celebrate your 5th wedding anniversary? Those were incredibly happy times. You worked too much but you probably remember that. As soon as I stop typing the future starts to bloom.

Currently we are in the midst of a significant heat wave. What is the climate like in your time? I have a guess, but it is too scary for me to think about for very long. I suspect that's a lot of how we make it from day to day. It's kind of funny how much we worry about specific humans, but how little we fear for humanity. It seems we talk a significant amount about our fears for humanity, but we are hamstrung by our persistence on the present. One reason I'm asking you so many questions.

We just finished reading Cormac McCarthy in book club and it is impossible not to consider the hypothetical situation that you and your immature, or even highly theoretical, offspring might face were you one day to wake up at the end of humanity. Past performance is not a guarantee of future results as they say.

Until next time.

Goodbye A2

2011-07-29T01:07:00-05:00

I pay money every month to A2 hosting for this site that I haven't posted on in a year. It seems ludicrous to continue to do this, so I'm changing strategies. You might notice that comments from previous posts are going away. Sorry, that's just the price you pay. The internet is emphemeral...

Identity, as promised

2010-06-07T00:00:00-05:00

Just finished redesigning the main page for this site. It now provides a handy grid with links to flickr, this blog, my Google Profile, twitter, github, delicious, and instapaper. Basically, in the words of the great Merlin Mann, "You have become the beneficiary of my personality spamming." It's designed in cutting edge HTML5 so it should look good in any browser except Internet Explorer. You can check it out at kgautreaux.net

A Difficult Problem

2010-05-25T00:00:00-05:00

I've been re-reading Atul Gawande's article about McAllen, TX and healthcare spending. To get perspective on why comparative effectiveness research might not be a bad thing, please note this section:

One night, I went to dinner with six McAllen doctors. All were what you would call bread-and-butter physicians: busy, full-time, private-practice doctors who work from seven in the morning to seven at night and sometimes later, their waiting rooms teeming and their desks stacked with medical charts to review. Some were dubious when I told them that McAllen was the country’s most expensive place for health care. I gave them the spending data from Medicare. In 1992, in the McAllen market, the average cost per Medicare enrollee was $4,891, almost exactly the national average. But since then, year after year, McAllen’s health costs have grown faster than any other market in the country, ultimately soaring by more than ten thousand dollars per person. “Maybe the service is better here,” the cardiologist suggested. People can be seen faster and get their tests more readily, he said. Others were skeptical. “I don’t think that explains the costs he’s talking about,” the general surgeon said. “It’s malpractice,” a family physician who had practiced here for thirty-three years said. “McAllen is legal hell,” the cardiologist agreed. Doctors order unnecessary tests just to protect themselves, he said. Everyone thought the lawyers here were worse than elsewhere. That explanation puzzled me. Several years ago, Texas passed a tough malpractice law that capped pain-and-suffering awards at two hundred and fifty thousand dollars. Didn’t lawsuits go down? “Practically to zero,” the cardiologist admitted. “Come on,” the general surgeon finally said. “We all know these arguments are bullshit. There is overutilization here, pure and simple.” Doctors, he said, were racking up charges with extra tests, services, and procedures. The surgeon came to McAllen in the mid-nineties, and since then, he said, “the way to practice medicine has changed completely. Before, it was about how to do a good job. Now it is about ‘How much will you benefit?’ ” Everyone agreed that something fundamental had changed since the days when health-care costs in McAllen were the same as those in El Paso and elsewhere. Yes, they had more technology. “But young doctors don’t think anymore,” the family physician said. The surgeon gave me an example. General surgeons are often asked to see patients with pain from gallstones. If there aren’t any complications—and there usually aren’t—the pain goes away on its own or with pain medication. With instruction on eating a lower-fat diet, most patients experience no further difficulties. But some have recurrent episodes, and need surgery to remove their gallbladder. Seeing a patient who has had uncomplicated, first-time gallstone pain requires some judgment. A surgeon has to provide reassurance (people are often scared and want to go straight to surgery), some education about gallstone disease and diet, perhaps a prescription for pain; in a few weeks, the surgeon might follow up. But increasingly, I was told, McAllen surgeons simply operate. The patient wasn’t going to moderate her diet, they tell themselves. The pain was just going to come back. And by operating they happen to make an extra seven hundred dollars. I gave the doctors around the table a scenario. A forty-year-old woman comes in with chest pain after a fight with her husband. An EKG is normal. The chest pain goes away. She has no family history of heart disease. What did McAllen doctors do fifteen years ago? Send her home, they said. Maybe get a stress test to confirm that there’s no issue, but even that might be overkill. And today? Today, the cardiologist said, she would get a stress test, an echocardiogram, a mobile Holter monitor, and maybe even a cardiac catheterization. “Oh, she’s definitely getting a cath,” the internist said, laughing grimly.

Even without the looming spectre of a lawsuit, physicians in the modern era order more tests than they need. This is a deep seated side-effect of the incredible complexity of medicine today. This study essentially debunks the myth that physicians practice "defensive" medicine because of the current legal climate. I believe that any physician who is honest will admit that they have ordered unnecessary tests for any number of reasons. I can list several reasons I've ordered unnecessary tests before.

I misunderstood the problem or the presentation.

The patient's symptoms seemed out of proportion to the diagnosis.

The patient's family indicated they expected more testing (verbally or silently).

I didn't have the time or resolve to argue with a patient who wanted the testing.

I wanted a shortcut

I want to relieve my own anxiety

People are appalled by "rationing" of medical care, but you can almost count on your modern physician not to tell you when something is unnecessary either because they haven't read the data and don't understand that it is unnecessary, or they want to be perceived as offering you something, even though that something is just as likely a waste of your time and money as it is an important diagnostic. We need to have an honest debate about what healthcare spending we are going to eliminate, and we will have to eliminate a large amount of our spending. Simply adding to the ranks of the insured, while an admirable goal, (and, I would argue, a reflection of our worth as a society) will not avoid the problem of runaway spending in our healthcare system. As physicians we have to honestly appraise ourselves and admit publicly what we already know privately, we spend our money on the wrong things because they are also the easy things. Care that is proven to be effective, and cost-effective, will not (and should not) be "rationed." We don't need to ration effective care, but we do need to cut the fat, and we need a central authority or clearinghouse to help physicians understand what is effective and cost-effective. Comparative effectiveness research is designed to do just that.

Rumination on the nature of this site

2010-05-19T00:00:00-05:00

The nature of personal websites has changed. It is raining outside and I've had a few minutes to think about ideas that have been banging around in my brain.

For a while a personal site was a place where you tinkered with this brand new concept of "HTML". It resulted in a lot of horrible looking pages with <blink></blink> tags and animated gifs. I'm looking at you geocities, even though you no longer exist. But the content of these pages was usually about portions of your identity that you wanted to share. Prior to the advent of blogs a personal site was about a single subject, usually the author.

In the heyday of personal weblogs that changed. We now still had personal sites but they were essentially event driven. I went on vacation and took some pictures, that's a blog post. This was fine for a while but eventually people realized that crafting long form prose or writing HTML to place pictures on your personal weblog was not only time consuming but redundant. Shouldn't we build a community site to share all of our pictures? Flickr. Shouldn't we build a community site to share all of our video? YouTube. Shouldn't we build a community site for one-liners, rhetorical questions, and link sharing? Twitter. What if we want to write more than 140 characters? Tumblr. Shouldn't somebody combine all of the above with targeted advertising and a questionable privacy policy? Facebook.

The original point was to share our thoughts, experiences, and ideas. Eventually anything that made that harder was just artifice that crumbled. Thus, busy people don't spend 10 minutes crafting a Wordpress blog post with pictures. Instead they send them directly to Flickr from their phone and then let Google Buzz or Twitter federate the posting to their friends.

All this is warmup to say I still believe that a personal website has cachet, but it is not about sharing, it is about identity. I own this site and it has information about me that I won't allow on a community site like Facebook because I need to be in control of that information. If I need to prove my identity online I should be able to reference this site as though it were my driver's license or fingerprint. In the coming months and years there will be a hard fought battle over online identity and whether you control it directly through your own site or via proxy on a site like Facebook.

This is a circuitous way to say this site will be much more about shameless self promotion and less about photos. Thanks for listening.

Sheeeeee...

2009-09-12T00:00:00-05:00

...it. I'm cleaning out my hard drive:

Pro and Con: Living in the Middle of Nowhere

2009-09-06T00:00:00-05:00

If you're thinking about moving to the middle of nowhere, here I offer a quick primer on the pros and cons.

Con:

It takes a really long time to get to your vacation destinations.

Pro:

You really appreciate when you get to your vacation destination.

Con:

Mountain Biking for three days in a row after a year of sedentary living takes it out of you.

Pro:

You really learn to appreciate rural electrification

Con:

Your iPhone has to be jailbroken and unlocked and only works with EDGE data speeds.

Pro:

The monthly bill for your iPhone on Viaero is anywhere from $15 to $35 less a month than it would be on AT&T.

Happy Labor Day.

Just because it could be worse...

2009-08-27T00:00:00-05:00

...doesn't mean it's not bad. If you're not obsessed by the same things I am you might have missed the recent, informal, investigation by the FCC into Apple rejecting the Google Voice iPhone application from the App Store. There are plenty of theories as to why this occurred and plenty of prior lamentations about the opacity and obsequiousness of the App Store review process, and then today I read this. It suddenly occurred to me that it is quite possible that any engineer working inside Apple is subjected to many times more scrutiny for tiny portions of the applications they create and they probably consider the App Store approval process a breeze. Imagine you're an Apple Engineer and you have to present to the man who decides whether your pet project lives or dies, and who once purportedly told a previous engineer, "You've baked a really lovely cake, but then you've used dog shit for frosting." I think Apple Engineers might laugh that the only thing that happens to some apps is they get rejected and sent back to the drawing board for icons that are too similar. Don't get me wrong, I think the App Store approval process is ludicrous. However, App Store reviewers do have to sort through 80 apps per reviewer a day, while constantly remembering WWSJD?

Lucy still smells like a feedlot

2009-08-24T00:00:00-05:00

This weekend, after putting up the wallpaper we took a break the go Mountain (...Prairie?) Biking near Anselmo.

Shaleah got a flat and had to walk most of the way.

This is the best smelling stuff Lucy rolled in all day.

Shaleah tempts the dogs with delicious beef jerky.

This dog mooched all of our water.

Good luck to Jeffrey in his L3 year...you big, beautiful ostrich.

I need two Netflix queues

2009-08-20T00:00:00-05:00

I think this post from Jonah Lehrer succinctly identifies a problem I've struggled with but haven't had a name for until now. I think I shall call it Netflix Pretension Syndrome (NPS).

I really need two Netflix queues. One where I put all the pretentious crap that I think I'm supposed to enjoy and then another queue that holds Will Ferrell comedies, Pulp Fiction, Arrested Development Season 1, action movies, and the last four Oscar winners for best visual effects. Whenever the HAL 9000 that runs the Netflix queuing system notes that I have not returned a particularly pretentious documentary about the Agro-Industrial complex or that director's cut of L'Avventura it automatically sends me an extra DVD from my "rescue" queue with a little note in the sleeve that says, "Feel free to return L'Avventura immediately. We'll ask you to rate it and we'll put it in your RSS feed; but don't worry, we won't actually use the rating when suggesting additional films you might like. Your secret is safe with us. Love, The Netflix Team."

I would gladly pay an additional $20 a year for this feature.

Happy Mother's Day

2009-05-10T00:00:00-05:00

For all of the mothers out there, but particularly Shirley and Merle I wrote a quick little program that you can download. I don't have a Windows machine to test this on so if it doesn't work please let me know so I can try to fix it.

For Windows: happy_mothers_day.exe

For Mac: happy_mothers_day.dmg

My Fake Job

2009-04-17T00:00:00-05:00

I've been spending a lot of time lately on what Shaleah lovingly refers to as my "fake job." You see, I have a "real job" which actually earns me money, and is, I'm told, beneficial to the community. And then I have my other "job" where I write Ruby code and make dumb websites. For the last 3 months I've been writing brand new features for one of my dumb websites and you should check it out here. I'm particularly happy with how the schedule functionality worked out. There was a long, arduous stretch where I tried to briefly comprehend JavaScript long enough to get those little red boxes to show up on the correct days. There is still at least one major bug. You get a gold star if you can tell me what it is. There are many more features (I'm not that slow) but most of them are not visible unless you are logged in. More recently my fake job took on another "client", when I agreed to create the website for the new Broken Bow Green Coalition. The site is just a placeholder for now but will soon be a delight for all ages. I'm pretty sure I only got the job via nepotism (they didn't care about me, they just wanted Shaleah's input), but they were kind enough to give me a project to make me feel important. So in the next few days I'll turn my attention away from fixing bugs on the clinic website and towards making new ones for greenbrokenbow.org, and somewhere in between I might find time to do my real job. You know, the one that I actually get paid to do. In closing I'd like to wish a very happy birthday to Shaleah who loves me so much that she supports my delusions of grandeur. If you want to see me awkwardly hold a cupcake you might want to visit her blog.

Busy being famous

2009-03-18T00:00:00-05:00

As Elliott is always quick to remind me I am horrible at blogging. Rest assured I haven't been doing nothing. http://www.cnmcpc.com doesn't code or maintain, or update itself, and I've also been working on writing version 2.0 of that site which has even more cool new features that nobody will ever use. Anyway, I've got a few photos, so I thought I'd break my self imposed silence. Behold.

Photos removed to protect the innocent.

Vagaries

2008-12-14T00:00:00-06:00

Something I've been thinking about lately, instead of posting to my blog. Basically, why isn't Andrew Bird James Blunt. He's a troubadour-type whose songs are just as catchy but have much awesomer lyrics. To whit:

i know we're going to meet some day in the crumbled financial institutions of this land there will be tables and chairs there'll be pony rides and dancing bears there'll even be a band cause listen, after the fall there will be no more countries no currencies at all, we're gonna live on our wits we're gonna throw away survival kits, trade butterfly-knives for Adderall and that's not all ooh-ooh, there will be snacks there will there will be snacks, there will be snacks.

Summon people to your next office birthday party with that.

My dogs discuss the issues

2008-10-15T00:00:00-05:00

The following are conversations I imagine my dogs have in the backyard. I have an active imagination. Regarding Television:

Lucy: Did you catch the new Mad Men last night? 'Thena: Yes, that Don Draper is such a rapscallion! Lucy: I can't believe the art director allowed Gil Sans to sneak in as the font for that ad campaign. 'Thena: You just heard that online. You wouldn't know Gil Sans from Gale Sayers if your life depended on it. Lucy: Well, gotta go, innocuous things aren't going to bark at themselves!

Regarding the Election:

'Thena: So, who're you going to vote for? Lucy: Being a Black Lab I'm torn between voting for Obama and voting for Palin. 'Thena: You know, you can't fetch a moose, right? Lucy: Yeah, but I really believe in her platform of making all pitbulls wear lipstick.

Regarding Text Messaging:

Lucy: OMG Girl! You are not *&%$#... 'Thena: Hello? Lucy: This iPhone was not designed for paws.

Regarding the Economy:

Lucy: My portfolio is taking a beating. 'Thena: It's because you're not diversified. All your money is in tennis balls and rawhides. Lucy: Dollar cost averaging! 'Thena: Do you even know that dollar cost averaging is? Lucy: Can I eat it? 'Thena: No. Lucy: Then I don't care.

Regarding Mustaches

'Thena: You're getting a bit of a 'stache there Wilford Brimley. Lucy: Like you should talk Tom Selleck. 'Thena: It looks like a caterpillar is mating with your upper lip. Lucy: You were adopted. 'Thena: You're dead to me! Lucy: Hey, you wanna destroy something expensive? 'Thena: Sounds good.

Dismal River: A Photo Essay

2008-10-04T00:00:00-05:00

Since none of us were in good enough shape to try our hand at mountain biking we struck out for Mullen to canoe down a stretch of the Dismal River. Since I'm posting this you know I survived, but we weren't so sure about Josh for a little while. "The last part of the path is a little....uh..." "Steep?" "Yes, steep that describes it." Somewhere in the distance a banjo is playing. We ran into a little bit of trouble, but we managed to catch a nice minnow in our canoe. Home stretch. We're still alive!

Now read this.

2008-09-30T00:00:00-05:00

Wow, yesterday's xkcd was great. If you like it as much as I do order it as a poster. Or order something else. If you have a couple hours to kill read back through the archives. This one is my all time favorite.

Everybody makes mistakes (that cost taxpayers $700 billion)

2008-09-21T00:00:00-05:00

Follow the bouncing ball. Many people smarter than me have followed this sequence of events and written about it intelligently but the plot is just so...intriguing. The current economic and financial sector crisis, like all good stories, has amazing drama, heroes and villains, and a plot that is very simple. In fact, you can diagram it in only a few steps. Behold... Gramm-Leach-Bliley Act passed --> "Investment Banks" package AAAA rated mortgage backed "securities" --> Profit! --> Housing crunch --> Loss! --> Foreclosure! --> Bailout! Now, in the next few months comes the most important part of any good story, the twist ending. Follow... $700 billion in "toxic paper" bought by government --> McCain elected --> Phil Gramm named Secretary of Treasury --> Reverse Robin Hood Ecomomics --> Middle Class pay for all our sins I'm starting two new catchphrases this week. "Toxic paper" == anything you find distasteful. "Allergic to lettuce" == euphemism for fat. "Shawn Kemp's rebounding this year is toxic paper. I wish he wasn't allergic to lettuce."

Looking back, going forward

2008-09-14T00:00:00-05:00

My calendar is telling me that it is almost fall and almost one year since we started working in Broken Bow. Fall is probably the best season in Nebraska and today is especially beautiful. Clear sunny skies but with that brisk tinge to the air that allows for wearing comfortable sweaters. It also means I get to watch football on a Sunday afternoon and the weather is so nice that even though I'm watching the Raiders I'm still smiling. One year, as any adult will tell you, is an incredibly long time that passes in the blink of an eye. Generally, we save these "reflections upon the past year" diatribes for December, but I thought one year of living and working in Broken Bow was a good time to assess progress and write down what I've learned.

You've got to make your own fun.
We've endured a year of presidential campaigns and we're still nowhere close to figuring out what to do.
It takes a long time for untrained laborers to build a simple patio.
The Smartest Man You Know didn't have a lot to say in 2008.
@katgautreaux has staggering Twitter output.
People from Jamaica are fast. No, I mean really fast.
Everyone says they want the election to be about the policy, but once again it's not.
The new patio looks awesome.

There's probably some other lessons like don't pick your carrots too early, Seattle is pretty in the summer, and Ruby is smarter than a dog, and easier to train.

It's called Synergy

2008-09-10T00:00:00-05:00

Yes sir (or madam), it is a mystery. A mystery photograph. In the 'biz' as I like to call it we'd colloquially refer to this as a "teaser." How will you find out the answer? Well, you could use your 'leet Photoshop skills to DeGaussian blur the image back to the original. Ha Ha, no that won't work of course, but I saw you reach for the mouse.

Probably the easiest way to find out is to wait a few days and then check Shaleah's blog for the inevitable post with crystal clear pictures. Until then this was the only way to keep Shaleah from accusing me of preempting her blog by posting the good pictures on my blog first. Now I'm off to code a flickr clone that only displays pictures that are Gaussian blurred. If Kat will do the design, I'll do the coding. I can smell the venture capital already. It smells like piña coladas and feet.

Finding by date range in Rails

2008-09-03T00:00:00-05:00

It's actually very simple to search a model attribute for a date range ever since Rails 1.2 or so, but the api docs and even books like Agile Programming with Rails don't seem to mention it, at least not where it's easy for an idiot like me to find. That's surprising since that book is the reference for Rails programming. If you didn't know any better, and you needed to find a group of records from your database that were created during a certain date range, you might be tempted to write some code like this to accomplish your search. [rails] object = Model.find(:all, :conditions => "created_at < 2.months.ago && created_at > 1.month.ago") [/rails] That would be wrong, though. The correct way is actually more simple and allows rails to do the heavy SQL lifting for you. The secret is to use a custom find method created by Rails for you from your database schema, and to use ranges in your condition statement. Viva La Metaprogramming! [rails] object = Model.find_all_by_created_at(2.months.ago..1.month.ago) [/rails] Pretty easy if someone tells you how to do it, but it took me several hours of Googling to find. Hopefully this will save time for others. Notice that find_all_by_created_at dynamic find method provided by Rails is used. When you create a scaffold or migration to set up your database using ruby script/generate ... then created_at will be a datetime formatted column created automatically by Rails. If you have another column that is datetime formatted like "sales_date" or "signup_date" you can also search on them by substituting the appropriate find_all_by method. As usual with Ruby and Rails the correct way to do it is much easier than the way you first suspect. Update: It seems the syntax highlighter doesn't want to do it's job on the front page. If you click through to read the whole post it works. I don't have time to sort it out now.

Callaway Kite Festival

2008-08-30T00:00:00-05:00

Sure, right now I'm sitting on the couch watching football, but earlier I was out in the hot sun on a field in the middle of nowhere watching kites, lots and lots of kites. Before Mr. Boone Pickens steals all of our wind in order to increase his personal fortune we're using it to fly kites. It's the annual Callaway Kite Festival and I have pictures.

Later in the day the giant windsock broke free and raced across the field for its freedom.

Here is everyone preventing the blankets from blowing away.

Here it looks like I'm helping to launch a kite but really I'm just trying to prevent it from hitting me in the face.

World Record!

2008-08-24T00:00:00-05:00

I'm pretty sure Shaleah and I set a world record for speed biking from Broken Bow to the South Loup River. Unfortunately, I also think that it was probably wind aided because on the way back it was definitely wind-hindered. Shaleah's mom was nice enough to drive our dogs to the river so they could enjoy the river.

Thena loves it because she can harass Lucy without having to swim.

Might there perchance be a ball in your hand that you could maybe throw for me.

Shaleah and Merle....and Lucy I guess.

Wine snobbery a fraud? Who could have possibly guessed?

2008-08-22T00:00:00-05:00

Everyone on the internet loves it when traditional media gets pwned as the kids like to say. Via Jason (my job is surfing the internet, suckers) Kottke, comes this gem, where a fake restaurant submits a wine list of wines that Wine Spectator previously panned to Wine Spectator's Award of Excellence paid listing and won an award. Stories like this happen all the time, and studies about how wine snobs "palates" are not nearly as refined as they claim are a dime a dozen. You can read about it here on the Freakanomics blog, or read about Frédéric Brochet's test of "wine experts" via Jonah Lehrer's blog. I link to Jonah Lehrer all the time because the Frontal Cortex blog is always fascinating. The bottom line is don't fill your magazine with recommendations that people bought with cash. It makes you look like a bunch of disingenuous dicks.

Pure Country

2008-08-20T00:00:00-05:00

You know that old joke about the backwards country song where the guy gets his truck, dog, and wife back? Anyway, the gist of the joke being that all country songs are the same. It made me think about how these days genres of music don't borrow from each other enough. All rock music is basically sped up blues music. It seems to me that modern artists, rather than pumping out one single and ten filler tracks, should just cover good songs from other genres. So, with that in mind, here is my list of country artists and what indie rock songs they should cover. Please keep in mind that I don't know anything about modern country music except the names of some of the artists. The only criteria for this list is it must be a song that I would buy in an instant from an artist I never would consider listening to.

Country Artist: Keith Urban Song: The Magnetic Fields' Fear of Trains Best Line: "Because the world's too cold for a girl like that, with a Blackfoot soul and a cowboy hat. Everything she loved went down the dragon track. She had a fear of trains." Country Artist: Tim McGraw Song: Bright Eyes' Oh, You are the Roots That Sleep Beneath my Feet and Hold the Earth in Place Best Line: "So when I'm suffering through some awful drive you occasionally cross my mind." Country Artist: Carrie Underwood Song: Antony and the Johnsons' My Lady Story Best Line: "Lie in road for you and I've been your slave. My womb's an ocean full of grief and rage." Country Artist: Toby Keith Song: Belle & Sebastian's The State That I Am In Best Line: "My brother had confessed he was gay it took the heat off me for a while. He stood up with a sailor friend, made it known upon my sisters wedding day." Country Artist: Kenny Chesney Song: The Good Life's You're Not You Best Line: "So, take off that necklace he stole from his mother, it doesn’t mean what it meant before. Pack up your pictures and gather all your clothes, but leave that lingerie that he bought you on the floor. It made you so awkward, you felt like a whore… it's not you, it's not you anymore."

Come on Trace Adkins! You could make millions. I'm sure I missed some good combinations. Feel free to tell me what I missed in the comments.

Embracing the ClichÃ©

2008-08-12T00:00:00-05:00

Until June 7th of 2008 (Would that be E-Day, did the letters keep going like that? How'd they get back around to VE day then? Yeah, I thought so) I hadn't picked up a golf club for probably ten years. Back in 1998 when the clubheads of my Wal-Mart special irons (purchased by my Grandfather to whom I am eternally grateful) started to randomly break loose from their clubshafts I just stopped playing. I had some other things to do, went to college, picked up computer tinkering as a hobby, went to medical school, went to residency, got married...and that sums up the last decade of my life in six simple phrases. I didn't have the money for new clubs and I didn't have the time for such a slow game, and I didn't have the desire to be outside for such long periods of time. I don't remember ever missing golf, but I, and I'm sure Jeffrey, can remember a time when I secreted golf from my pores. It was something my brothers and I did everyday in our small town of Friend. There wasn't a lot else to do. When we weren't playing golf we were reading about it incessantly. How I could spend so much time reading Golf Magazine I'll never fathom. When we weren't reading about golf we were watching it on television. To some I'm sure watching golf sits in their brain as the archetype for boring. When people need an example of boredom watching golf on television pops into their heads. Knowing my personality as I do, then (I've picked up some things after twenty-nine years of living with me) it baffles me why I stopped playing so abruptly and never went back. I think it probably has to do with the mentality it takes to go through post-graduate training. I'm sure Jeffrey spends no time at the golf course in Tucson. I also believe that it had something to do with geography. There aren't a lot of golf courses in midtown Omaha, but then again I never once set foot on the Wray Country Club links. All of this, I'm sure you'll notice, is set up for the reveal that is hinted at by that title teaser. It turns out that although Shaleah has only played golf once or twice before it's an activity that we both enjoy, that gets us outside, and that we can do together (at least until our dance lessons begin in October. Stop snickering.) Anyway, we are now two doctors who play golf regularly, or at least we go to the driving range regularly. And so today as the clubhead from my fifteen year old five iron flew down the range (the last of my original set of clubs to survive) it suddenly occurred to me that I knew where to spend my stimulus check that I've already spent thrice over. The new clubs will ship tomorrow, arrive next week, and sit next to the bicycle and the new hard drive array representing the same money spent three times.

Modeling dog brains in Ruby

2008-08-09T00:00:00-05:00

Shaleah and I were talking about how our dogs think and so I threw together a few programs to illustrate their (ahem) thought process. [sourcecode language='ruby'] def at_the_park @doggies = ["Lucy", "Thena"] if location != park @doggies.get_in_car elsif location == park @doggies.continue_running_around_and_rolling_in_dead_things else tail.wag end end [/sourcecode]

Thena finally figured out that getting in the car when it's in the garage takes you to the park, but getting in the car at the park takes you away from the park.

[sourcecode language='ruby'] def head_scratching lucy = Dog.new(:intelligence => false) if head_scratched == true tongue.lick_scratcher elsif head_scratched == false lucy.stick_head_in_potential_scratchers_crotch_until_they_give_in else look_on_face = dumb end end [/sourcecode]

I think this one is pretty self explanatory.

Candygram!

2008-08-09T00:00:00-05:00

The theme for the Custer County Fair parade this year was "Saturday Night Live." What that meant was 2 floats with Coneheads, 2 floats with Blues Brothers, 1 set of Cheerleaders, and 15 floats with the words "Saturday Night Live" written on the side but seemingly no connection to the show. One man, however, brought his passion, dedication, and borderline schizophrenia to bear on his creation of a Candygram Shark façade that wrapped around his bicycle. He also had an igloo cooler strapped to his body containing the candy that he threw to the crowd. Unfortunately, I don't have a picture of the pure condensed awesomeness that was this man's float. And yes, he rode the shark around town for hours after the parade had ended.
Here the Summers's enjoy the 102 degree Fahrenheit heat of Broken Bow in August.

"Where's my CANDY!"

Oh, how did this picture of my awesome new bike get in here? Weird.

Mike and Jen's wedding

2008-08-05T00:00:00-05:00

I just realized I'd not posted any pictures of Mike and Jennifer's wedding. So, you know, here you go.

Blogs do something useful?

2008-08-05T00:00:00-05:00

So, today on the radio show I talked about the changing science behind how SSRI's are theorized to work. I only know about this subject because I regularly read Jonah Lehrer's Frontal Cortex blog. Lehrer regularly writes for Seed magazine and has a book titled Proust was a Neuroscientist. All credit to him for making neuroscience interesting.

Rails: 'undefined constant Foo' in_place_editing plugin

2008-07-31T00:00:00-05:00

Warning to family and friends: I'm going to start publishing some stuff like this so Google can index it for me. Feel free to skip. Environment:

Rails 2.1 (Edge)
in_place_editing plugin Revision: 9250

First, since in_place_editing was moved out into a plugin in Rails 2.0 it hasn't been maintained. So if the error you're getting is that your in place page edits are stuck on "Saving..." forever you need to apply this patch to /vendor/plugins/in_place_editing/lib/in_place_macros_helper.rb This page can help you understand why and where to patch. Essentially the cross-site scripting forgery protection in Rails > 2.0 prevents the javascript callback from saving the in place edits into the database. Second, if you've made it past the stuck saving forever bug, but your controller is named differently than your model you might get an error such as undefined constant Foo when you try to access the edits. You will only see this error if you're stepping through the page scripts using something like Firebug. Install Firebug if you don't have it, trust me, you need it. Why would your controller be named differently than your model? Well, you could have a controller for directing the normal view of your page and then another controller for the administration of the pages but if you built the administrative interface first your model might be named Admin but your controller named Pages, as it was in my particular case. Anyway the crux of the issue is this method in /vendor/plugins/in_place_editing/lib/in_place_editing.rb [sourcecode language='rails'] def in_place_edit_for(object, attribute, options = {}) define_method("set_#{object}_#{attribute}") do @item = object.to_s.camelize.constantize.find(params[:id]) @item.update_attribute(attribute, params[:value]) render :text => @item.send(attribute).to_s end end [/sourcecode] Stepping through the code this method builds another Ruby method for your javascript callback to call. The method will be named set_(whateveryourmodelisnamed)_(whateverattributeyouaresetting). If your controller is called pages and your model is called something else this will fail. In your view you need some embedded Ruby code (Erb) to call in_place_editor_field and pass in the object and the attribute. It may look like this: [sourcecode language='rails'] < %= in_place_editor_field :page, 'body', {}, {:rows => 40, :cols => 65, :external_control => 'edit', :external_control_only => true} %> [/sourcecode] Uh, oh. So now def in_place_edit_for will be called with the argument object = :page so when it creates the method it WILL be named correctly (i.e. it will be named set_page_body instead of set_admin_body) but the find method will be trying to access a model named Page instead of the correct call which would be: [sourcecode language='rails'] Admin.find(params[:id]) [/sourcecode] Obviously this will fail but the error message makes you look for a constant, I'm not sure why. My fix was a horrible hack that replaced #{object} in the in_place_edit_for method with the string for the actual controller. Thus the method then became correctly named set_page_body but it actually accesses the Admin model for the information. [sourcecode language='rails'] def in_place_edit_for(object, attribute, options = {}) define_method("set_page_#{attribute}") do #uhhh, horrible hack, "set_page_#{attribute}" used to read "set_#{object}_#{attribute}" @item = object.to_s.camelize.constantize.find(params[:id]) @item.update_attribute(attribute, params[:value]) render :text => @item.send(attribute).to_s end end [/sourcecode] A more elegant method would probably be to pass an additional parameter to the in_place_edit_for method and then use that name to construct the set_page_body method name while leaving the object alone something like. [sourcecode language='rails'] def in_place_edit_for(object, attribute, name, options = {}) define_method("set_#{name}_#{attribute}") do #ooohhh, pretty @item = object.to_s.camelize.constantize.find(params[:id]) @item.update_attribute(attribute, params[:value]) render :text => @item.send(attribute).to_s end end [/sourcecode] Your method call in your pages controller would then have to read thus: [sourcecode language='rails'] in_place_edit_for :admin, :body, :page [/sourcecode] I'm not sure that would work. I haven't tested it, but the ugly looking one does work in practice and gives you whiz-bang in place editing for your administration interface even if you named your controller wrong. Sometimes convention over configuration can make things harder, but it makes almost everything else easier. I do think in_place_editing could be more flexible as a plugin. Update: Okay, I did just test the more elegant way and it does work, at least in my particularly simple instance. You do have to remember to restart your script/server because you're editing the plugin itself and plugins don't get reloaded automatically even in development mode.

Nobody really wants to pay for preventive medicine.

2008-07-30T00:00:00-05:00

I recently skimmed this article via who else but Jack Shedd yet again. The concept of the "medical home" is something the AAFP has been lobbying Congress for with regards to increased Family Physician reimbursement for several years. The crux of this chicken/egg problem is that if you reduce the number of patients a primary care physician sees you'll have to give up care for someone, but if you don't reimburse for non-direct patient care work you can never increase the number of primary care physicians you have. It is not strictly about the money either. Being a primary care physician, particularly in an urban area where you are only allowed to have an office practice, can be just as monotonous as any job. Rural primary care physicians are somewhat insulated from this by their ability to perform procedures without angering too many specialists, but here there are trade offs as well. At least somebody is trying to ameliorate the problem because solving it seems impossible.

My New Bicycle is your new bicycle.

2008-07-28T00:00:00-05:00

Attention U.S. Electorate!

Barack Obama is not your new bicycle. My New Bicycle is your new bicycle.

In these uncertain times we need a leader that will solve our gas crisis, can't choke on a pretzel because it doesn't have a mouth, and has never fallen off a Segway. My New Bicycle's middle name is Saddam, but that doesn't phase it, its charisma and pure blackness (with hints of red) will carry the day! My New Bicycle has sound foreign, energy, and domestic policies, but it's stoic, it knows when to keep its Alloy hubs; Alex alloy rims w/eyelets shut.

My New Bicycle built a Madrassa so awesome even Jesus said, "Good work." My New Bicycle personally ended the Arab-Israeli conflict by forcing the two parties to talk while threatening them with an American Flag lapel pin. My New Bicycle doesn't even have lapels, but it keeps a lifetime supply of pins handy just in case it grows lapels using its incredible powers of self-regeneration.

My New Bicycle renounced its old church, started a new church and lured all the old church's followers to the new church. My New Bicycle created its own Presidential seal that included a Bicycle riding an Eagle, while clutching $200 trillion to pay off the deficit. FDR is in the background, winking.

My New Bicycle. Yes, we can.

Time to make the donuts.

2008-07-24T00:00:00-05:00

I promise, I deliver....and I really like hearing myself talk. You're probably wondering why I've made the switch from http://wrayblog.blogspot.com to my own domain. Well, I read this via the great Merlin Mann, and I thought that I'd start to, "Write well, write often, and write with passion." Or, as Mr. Aday is fond of saying, "Two out of three ain't bad." So first, a warning. If I'm going to write often then a lot of this is going to disappoint. I'll be writing about computers, and the internet, and medicine, and sometimes it will be funny but mostly it will be inscrutable and usually it will just be so it's written down for my future reference. So be kind. If this is going to trouble you stay away from the RSS feed. They say you should know your audience, and I promise not to reduce the number of posts that consist just of pictures I've posted to Flickr, although you'll see below that the most recent Flickr pictures are already integrated here. And if we ever make another Gaucast it will still be posted here (Mom), but now I don't have to host it at another site, you'll be able to download it direct from this page, and the look and feel of the page can be whatever I want it to be. You're not interested in that, though, so in closing I'll just say it's nice you read this far.

Let's test this out.

2008-07-22T00:00:00-05:00

I've started a new project and with it a new blog with a new domain. You'll have to change your rss readers to point to http://kgautreaux.net/blog/feed/ if you want updates. But now you can get comment feeds as well so maybe you'll add a little content for me. http://kgautreaux.net/blog/comments/feed/ if you want the comments delivered. The project is a post every other day even if they're tiny. That's one.

Just so everyone is on the same page.

2008-07-16T00:00:00-05:00

If you haven't been following along, currently Shaleah and I are here. We started out from Broken Bow and made it out to the Olympic National Park for Mike and Jenn's wedding then back to Seattle. Let's have some evidence, shall we? Shaleah danced with her Dad at the wedding. We met a deer at Hurricane Ridge. We also met some nice mountain goats. The wilderness that eats cellphones. We made it back to Seattle in one piece.

Changes at HQ

2008-06-21T00:00:00-05:00

Now is the short several month time interval in Nebraska where the temperature is not too something and so there have been some projects in the works at the house. Some are still in the secret, hush-hush planning stages and cannot be revealed here.

First, there's a giant hole in the backyard. What do you do with a giant hole in the backyard? Fill it with the lifeless bodies of your vanquished enemies? Whoa, easy there Rumsfeld, we're just going to turn it into a patio.

Pay no attention to the fact that we don't have anywhere to put the dirt.

Second, Shaleah's (Peaches and) Herb garden, and her regular garden are really taking off, although I'm told mostly the zucchini is crushing all other plants in a mad grab for egomanical garden domination.

Above is a view from the veranda where the potted plants huddle for warmth.

Third, Shaleah is busy out-etsying Etsy. The sewing machine is not the sole provence of you, Spongetta! She made us some nice cushions for our bistro chairs. Behold!

A closer inspection:

It's as if the American Flag and a group of sexy ladies had twins that were comfortable to sit on.

Turn off your mike before you vomit

2008-06-08T00:00:00-05:00

Join me, won't you, for this latest installment of the Gaucast. It might surprise you that this week we talk about nothing of importance besides Elliott's plumbing difficulties, law school research, the NBA, and true Air Force dedication. If you get bored just listen to the beginning and ending. That's where the songs go.

Gaucast #13 (Plunger)

AT&T wants to take your virginity

2008-05-08T00:00:00-05:00

I don't understand. Does AT&T's marketing department want Meatloaf to get to third base with this kid? Jim Steinman you incestuous pedophilic bastard! I think they should have left in the coda where the kid gets frustrated with his two year contract and sings about praying for the end of time.

P.S. Before you hit the send button on that email you've composed, Comic Book Guy, be aware that I know the GoPhone doesn't have a long term contract. I'm stretching the premise for comedic effect.

Also, a Meatloaf Aday sounds like great nutrition advice.

Every member of the household that smells like dead animals will be sleeping outside.

2008-04-24T00:00:00-05:00

They call me "Krazy Eyes", what's it to you?

The forecast is...ZOMG RUN!!!11!!!!11

2008-04-11T00:00:00-05:00

This is April in Nebraska. You should thank your lucky stars that you live in Tucson instead. Of course, you could live in Little Rock so don't complain.

Like Laguna Beach without all that pesky "water"

2008-04-02T00:00:00-05:00

They emerge from their chyrsalis with that smile.

Dramatic Prarie Dog is also on vacation.

Is that our car on fire?

Translation from Libertarian-speak to English of selected portions of Mandates are not the answer by David Gratzer

2008-04-01T00:00:00-05:00

Original article available here.
< Teddy Roosevelt Hat=On >

Insurers call them “young invincibles”: twentysomething hipsters who will spend $4 on a café latte or $80 on a monthly gym membership but won’t buy health insurance.

People under 30 are idiots and should get off my lawn.

“Health insurance wasn’t even an option,” 24-year-old aspiring designer Andrew Ondrejcak told the magazine New York in March 2007. “I was flying through my savings, trying to get a career started. . . . The last thing I’m going to do is spend $300 or whatever on insurance, you know?” Ondrejcak’s personal health plan: running, yoga, and vitamins. The cost: acute appendicitis and a $37,000 hospital bill.

All young people care about are double syrup half-caf Venti double tall lattes and trudging around on my goddamn lawn!

Liberal proponents think of mandates as social insurance.

Nothing provides a better safety net than handing over your healthcare to a multinational conglomerate with your best interests in mind.

But both the liberal and conservative arguments are less persuasive than they seem at first glance. Health-insurance companies pool risk in much more complicated ways than most people assume. Americans cannot be classified into one group for insurance purposes; every health-insurance company has numerous pools, dividing people by state, size of employer, and many other characteristics.

They don't employ actuaries to maximize profits, they're there to make sure everyone can afford health insurance.

Further, evidence shows that costs are influenced much less by mandates than by consumers’ ability to buy a broad range of competing health-insurance products.

Trust me, there's evidence, I'm just to lazy to cite it.

An insurance policy for a single male resident in mandate-enforced Boston, for example, costs five times more than a policy for his identical twin in mandate-free Tucson.

We should all move to Tucson! Also, correlation DOES equal causation.

This cost disparity is due in part to the Bay State’s many insurance regulations, which limit the types of policies that consumers can buy and drive up prices.

Just like passage of the Gramm-Leach-Billey Act allowed JP Morgan Chase to pay bottom dollar for Bear Stearns, so too will deregulation allow magical butterflies to dance around and make us all immortal.

As for the responsibility argument, uncompensated care costs federal and state governments roughly $40 billion a year—in a health economy that tops more than $2 trillion annually. That’s a very small percentage of the total expenditure and certainly doesn’t amount to a hidden tax of $900 per person.

Money is falling from the sky!

A third of uninsured Americans have family incomes greater than $50,000; 17 percent have incomes in excess of $75,000. They are opting not to buy coverage because they think that paying thousands annually, while perhaps not seeing a doctor for years on end, is a bad deal.

If people don't buy insurance because they don't think they'll need it, obviously making it cheaper will change that, right? Later I will confuse you by saying preventative care is important.

Rather than handing out more government subsidies, we should inject more competition into markets by allowing people to buy health-insurance policies across state lines.

Enron represented the best of power deregulation when it sold energy to California across state lines at only a 200% markup. Cancer is this year's rolling blackout. Also black is white, up is down, and telco deregulation is really solving that last mile problem.

An even bolder approach would be to end 60 years of bad tax policy and scrap the employer deduction for health benefits, replacing it with a tax credit for every individual and family. Notably, these are all ideas that John McCain, not known for his focus on domestic policy, has embraced.

Remember when John McCain stated in public that there was "strong" evidence of a link between vaccines and autism? Let's put that health science genius in charge!

Rather than mandate participation in a broken system, Washington should concentrate on basic, sensible reforms and then let markets experiment.

I am high as a kite.

Better never than late.

2008-03-23T00:00:00-05:00

Join us for this ~~week's~~ ~~month's~~ year's Gaucast where we discuss a cornucopia of issues ranging from the NBA to the ABA. Warning: This Gaucast probably qualifies for the [Explicit] tag due to several references by Elliott to male genitalia, or poultry, I can't decide which.

Gaucast #12 (Rick Roll'd)

Time is a harsh mistress

2008-02-17T00:00:00-06:00

Nike is apparently celebrating 25 years of FORCE. What force I am not sure. Gravitational? Unstoppable? Van der Waals?

Given the appearances of their previous ad campaigns it appears they're celebrating FORCing their athletes to look ridiculous. I swear these are actually screen captures from their hard to navigate Flash site. Go here to witness for yourself.

Jeff Ruland, truly a game changer. Not since Tom Selleck at USC has someone so mustachioed played at this level.

This appears to be Charles Barkley and I'm guessing Quinn Buckner dressed as, I'm guessing again, Ruby Rhod in their high-school's stage production of The Fifth Element. I think Charles may have been down with gay marriage for longer than previously supposed.

Truly, judge not, lest ye be judged. Whoops.

Picture pages, Picture pages.

2008-02-17T00:00:00-06:00

You can view the whole set here, but I thought I'd post some photos from our recent trip to Colorado.

Always keep a wide base.

"I said we came here to borrow a cup of sugar!"

This is exactly how Christopher McCandless died.

The outdoors is much brighter than I suspected.

My wife ran off to Mexico

2008-02-02T00:00:00-06:00

Technically, she's coming back and I still retain custody of one Lucifer P. Jones and Athena Z. Jones. (The Z stands for Zzzzzzzz.) Has there ever been a custody battle where each party argued that the other should have to retain custody?

There won't be any new pictures accompanying this post because MY WIFE LEFT ME AND TOOK ME CAMERA. Let's hope she posts some cool pictures from Mexico on her blog.

The tough part about having a real job is when I get a good idea for a blog post sometimes I forget to write it down and then when I get time to post I've inevitably forgotten what I was going to say. But today I wanted to welcome back Matt Standridge to blogging. He never should have left, really. I don't have any children and I still have a blog. He has two, which I'm sure his wife can watch for 15 minutes while he crafts a post. That is assuming she didn't RUN OFF TO MEXICO and leave him wretchedly alone.

I'm also announcing today that I've graduated from podcasting to a real live radio gig. That's right, I am now one of the out of touch media elite. They didn't even make me get a degree in journalism. Jeffrey, did you know you didn't have to go to college to be on the radio? That would have been easier for you. I did read a journalism course synopsis so I felt as though I'd learned enough. I mean, how much could there be to know about "Ignoring facts: How to create a narrative where none exists?", "Modern Martyrdom: Why keeping sources secret makes you look like a hero (even if it's not necessary).", "Try to be handsomer: Chris Matthews used to have 5 chins.", and "Sound bites: Take a view so absolutist it needs no exposition."

Right, so if you like the dulcet tones of my voice but you think Gaucast is too exciting for your delicate constitution you can tune in here at 8:30 am CST every Tuesday. The good news is that even if you miss the show 90% of the setlist on KBBN is Electric Light Orchestra. In the interest of full disclosure CNMC pays the radio station for me to come on and sound like an idiot for 30 minutes every week. That's not without precedent though, my mom used to pay neighborhood kids to be my friends.

Still, it's not like an infomercial really. I keep shouting, "SET IT...", but the studio audience never chimes in "...AND FORGET IT!"

Next week I'll be doing the show using only Spooneristic, Emmit Smith-esque turns of phrase. Envoy the shoe, forks!

Together we can win the War on Christmas

2007-12-30T00:00:00-06:00

Listen:
Tim Rinne has come unstuck in time.

He seems to think everyone wants to hear about why the Norman invasion was really one set of Germanic peoples invading another.

I don't care about that. I just want to drink gravy from a straw, enjoy Phil Jackson's bowtie and laugh at Jamie Lynn Spears.

"Wait until you taste my peppernuts."

"If I were wearing this outfit ironically that'd really be something."

"This turkey is hard to carve."

December is for imposing your tastes upon others.

2007-12-30T00:00:00-06:00

It's end of the year list time again so you can't really blame me for getting caught up in the hype. This is my favorite time of the year not because of stupid things like quality time with your family to reflect upon the passing year, but because this is the time of the year when everyone publishes the Top Ten lists. How will I know what music and movies every hipster douchebag with a Blogger account loved this year if it weren't for the month of December?

As a service to the reader I've limited myself to one winner in each category (ties are allowed), you're welcome!

Best Album of 2007

Stars - In Our Bedroom After the War
Yeah, they are pretty much horrible live, but who thought they could follow-up Set Yourself on Fire with an even more consistently listenable album with lyrics like, "How could anyone not love the terrible things you do?" And it has a song modeled after a personals ad.

Best Album of 2007 you didn't think you'd like

The National - Boxer
Something about the typography on their last album, Alligator, made you think this was fratboy music. Damned if you were going to end up owning this year's Songs about Jane, but then you heard the song Green Gloves so you bought the album and damn...is...it...good.

Best Song of 2007

(four way tie)
Arcade Fire - (Antichrist Television Blues)
Bright Eyes - If the Brakeman Turns My Way
The Fratellis - Chelsea Dagger
Spoon - The Underdog

Best Song of 2007 on an otherwise horrendously overrated album

Of Montreal - Heimdalsgate Like A Promethean Curse
This song has the trifecta: key shifts that are related to the meaning of the lyrics, crazy drug references, and ruminations on the fickle nature of inspiration. But the rest of the album is pretty damn tedious. Buy the single.

Best British album of 2007 (that actually came out in 2005)

The Boy Least Likely To - The Best Party Ever
If you have children that can't understand the lyrics they will love this album. It sounds like the catchiest kid's show theme you can think of. If your children can understand the lyrics you might want to just enjoy this one by yourself.

Best Song About Housework

Hate It Here - Wilco
I try to stay busy too. I post to my blog, I cut my toenails, I load the dishwasher. I'm just like Jeff Tweedy!

Worst Album of 2007

Bjork - Volta
I like you Bjork. I like the Sugarcubes. I LOVED Dancer in the Dark. You scared the bejeezus out of me when I was a kid by riding around on a giant teddy bear with one eye on MTV, but I cannot stand this album. Sorry.

I'm stopping here before this list grows out of control but the You'll never fool me into buying another one of your tossed-off half-assed albums you drunken idiot award goes to....Ryan Adams - Easy Tiger.

Happy New Year.

Wii Scavenger Hunt - Coming in 2008

2007-12-16T00:00:00-06:00

Yep, it's been a long time. This is what I've been working on. It doesn't amount to much does it? It's only here to whet your appetite for pictures of our new home furnishings!

Next time we'll consider actually placing Kat somewhere in the same zip code as the microphone. Enjoy your Gaucast...you earned it.

Gaucast #11 (Inferior Potassium)

There is no pun here.

2007-12-16T00:00:00-06:00

I don't care what you say. I maintain that there is NO clever way to combine the words Nebraska and Ski together in a whimsical fashion. I defy you to come up with one! Go ahead. Wrack your brain for hours. Done yet? See I have been proven correct yet again.

Yeah, yeah, I forgot my camera again.

It's hard to tell but even with the goggles I still blinked.

Cow-tank oasis.

"I think these dogs might be following us."

"I'm skiing as far away from this blog as I can."

Come to Nebraska!

2007-11-18T00:00:00-06:00

Seriously, if you slow down too much fat chicks will crawl though your window and before you know it fat chicks will be filling up your EXXtended Tuff-Man Crew Cab before you can say, "Fat chicks are like Zombies. Except instead of delicious brains fat chicks are driven by an insatiable hunger for troglodytes who hate them....and brains."

Does your alpha-adrenergic blocker punish your prostate?

2007-11-04T00:00:00-05:00

Drug advertisements have become increasingly inane. Not that they were really ever nane per se but lately it seems that drug companies have realized that the same methods that sold metric tons of Viagra to American males suffering emasculation from every aspect of modern life can work to sell medicines that don't (necessarily) give you erections.

Plavix will totally waterboard your platelets into submission! It will pimpslap your platelets around like they're a ho that owes you your money. With Plavix you're manlier than some tiny clot that is giving you crushing substernal chest pain right now and will eventually lead to your death. With Plavix, you won't have to stop watching football because you're having a heart attack.

Here's to men! Men, Flomax will put a severed horse head in the bed where your prostate sleeps. Flomax will go to the mattresses against your prostate. No longer will you have to pee sitting down like a wee girl. Now your golden stream of concentrated manliness will gush forth from your urethra like a nitrogenous Niagara Falls.

How could you call yourself a real man and NOT be taking Flomax? Flomax is your wingman broseph. He will take one for the team, amend his "No-fatties" rule, and totally bang that hot chick's ugly friend for you. You know, the one they call mini-van? Flomax would do that for you dude because, to Flomax, "Bros before hos" is not just a phrase that rhymes, it's a mantra.

By the way, Flomax is sorry he caused you a decrease in semen. He's contrite, ya heard?

Gaucast Night In America

2007-10-28T00:00:00-05:00

Yes, this is a little late. But I have a real job now so I have to...you know...sort of do that job. The job itself is going well. I made a sporotrichosis diagnosis this week so that made my day. Enjoy this guestless Gaucast.

Gaucast #10 (L-shaped couch)

ATSMYK: Guide to Podcasts

2007-10-06T00:00:00-05:00

Not since the halcyon days of Marconi (or Tesla, or whoever) has radio enjoyed such popularity. Sure, it's not television but your eyes are crying out for a rest, what with you subjecting them to the YouTube, boring Ken Burns documentaries, and your beloved Chicago Cubs getting their asses handed to them by some team from Arizona.

To help give your eyes a much needed break I've compiled a list of quality podcasts that you can listen to while ignoring the important people in your life.

All podcasts complete with links to the iTunes podcast directory or, if you prefer, over the real internet.

1.) This American Life (iTunes link)(On the Web)
Let's get one thing clear right off the bat. This list will be a little NPR heavy but I'm not a sycophant. This is no place for a rant about the striking similarities between Garrison Keillor and Beelzebub but let's just agree that A Prarie Home Companion is the aural equivalent of the Eighth Circle of Hell.

2.) The Sound of Young America (iTunes)(Web)
Things that make you laugh are good. This show consists mostly of comedians being interviewed. Warning if you are a dedicated NPR listener: this show may occaisionally contain hip-hop music that does NOT reveal anything whatsoever about genocide in Darfur, is not related to beat poetry, and is not protest against politcal oppression.

3.) NY Times - The Ethicist (iTunes)(Web)
Randy Cohen answers your peers' tough ethical dilemmas allowing you to silently chuckle at the thought of considering yourself the peer of people who write to the New York Times. It's a verbatim reading of his column but the letters are usually voiced by struggling authors with a book to promote and they always bring the voice acting chops.

4.) All Songs Considered (iTunes)(Web)
Host Bob Boilen used to be the producer of All Things Considered until he was fired for what I must assume was soliciting an undercover police officer in a Minneapolis airport bathroom. Anyway, he brings the same sort of edgy, fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants, devil may care style that made All Things famous to his work on All Songs.

Ok, Boilen is as boring as the day is long but you can discover some good music here.

5.) NY Times - Backstory (iTunes)(Web)
In my fantasy world where Robert Redford and Bob Woodward are the same person, this is what I imagine journalists talk about during their days off. Having a brother who worked as a journalist disabuses me of such pie in the sky thinking because I know that all they talk about is the Phoenix Suns. So now I just imagine all journalists are Christopher Hitchens.

6.) Fresh Air (iTunes)(Web)
Teri Gross is hot. I guess the photographer surprised her while she was playing Re-enact the now transvestite Lee Harvey Oswald's role in the Kennedy Assassination using an imaginary handgun. Oh right, like you've never played that before!

So enjoy adding listening to podcasts to your list of things that you'll feel like a failure for not accomplishing every week. I'm just glad I made it through this whole post without once using the phrase aural pleasure.

Bye iTunes Plus (it was nice tolerating you)

2007-09-25T00:00:00-05:00

So, today Amazon unveiled their new mp3 download service. You can probably mark down 9/25/07 on your calendars as the day Keith stopped buying physical CD's. As an aside, it's a little creepy that you mark events in my life down on your calendar, but the less said about that the better.

Now, I like iTunes for managing music but I've always hated the iTunes Music Store. $1.00 per track, $10.00 per album for DRM'd AAC is a value proposition that will never attract me as a customer, and I've never bought any DRM'd tracks from iTunes, preferring instead to buy mp3's from eMusic or rip mp3's from CD's.

Then, in May of this year, salvation! iTunes plus is launched, and yeah, it's only tracks from EMI and they're only 192kbps (and not mp3)...AND you have to pay a $0.29 premium per track, but it's better than nothing right?

So I bought one album from iTunes in the PLUS (plus means it's better) format, but the small selection and higher cost disappointed me. In a way I felt it was my duty to support EMI and the iTunes Store as they pursued they only non-insane online music sales policy of any major record label. But I don't want to listen to KT Tunstall, Coldplay, or Keith Urban no matter how little DRM those tracks have attached.

Then a few days ago I tried to purchase Paul's Boutique on iTunes and it failed. I know, that's a complaint best left to this site, but if you build a distribution system that pleases me you'll get a lot of my money because I spend a lot of my money on frivolous things like music that only exists as 1's and 0's!

Then today my salvation appears like a shimmering oasis, full of promises that I dare not believe in but seem so tangible and wonderful. Completely DRM free Mp3 format, high quality 256 kbps, independent labels, EMI and Universal, Amazon's recommendation logic and (hallelujah!) the album art is embedded in the track metadata. Yeah, I know, NBC/Universal/Vivendi are a bunch of dicks, but if their music group is willing to sell me what I want at a reasonable price maybe they're smart dicks. It takes all kinds.

Back to downloading.

At least the dogs are getting smarter.

2007-09-20T00:00:00-05:00

I'm too stupid to be able to build a regular mailbox post so at the risk of hours of mocking by my wife I purchased a pre-cut and drilled PVC mailbox post assembly kit. Even this was taxing to my limited DIY skills but after hours of work it is finally complete.

In keeping with my theme of angering Shaleah by paying for overpriced, premade items we received our new entertainment center. Sleek, low to the ground, with a drag coeficient of nearly 0.1, this modern marvel only required that we screw on the legs and the door handles. It even came with its own screwdriver. The only drawback I could see with this particular model was it cost eight times as much as the television that now sits on it, has its own event horizon, and I had to devise an elaborate pulley and incline system not unlike that used by ancient Egyptians to build the pyramids, just to get it into our living room.

So being the intelligent, decisive, fearless keeper's of your medical destiny that we are for our next purchase we decided to swing the pendulum in the polar opposite direction and buy an inexpensive, self-assembled, foyer residing bench seat with storage. Luckily we paid for it in tiny, tiny monopoly dollars.

Do not adjust your monitors. Despite what you may have seen in this picture I am not actually thirty feet tall. The bench, it seems, would not be out of place in Bag End. I think I saw Bilbo inscribed on the bottom. Of course, given its size he had to leave off the O. Zing!

In the last crushing blow to my intellectual ego this week, our pea brained dogs outsmarted our $5,000 fencing system by hurling their collected masses against our fence until one of the slats popped free and they spent the morning gallivanting the neighborhood unbeknownst to us. Here, witnesseth the aftermath.

Insert wheat/chaff metaphor here

2007-09-16T00:00:00-05:00

This episode features music from Stars, Feist and Okkervil River to drown out the super concentrated suckiness. Next time we'll add a guest star to liven up the proceedings.

Honestly, I cut a bunch of crap out of this episode so it only clocks in at around 28 minutes. That gives you an idea of how much didn't make the cut, and trust me, the bar was not set that high.

Now that I've got you interested what will it take to get you to listen to this podcast today?

Gaucast #9 (Lipstick on a Pig)

Operation Make Kat Jealous is underway

2007-09-14T00:00:00-05:00

Here's a picture of me wearing a sweater while sitting on our new doormat from Anthropologie. Official company motto, "50 bucks says you'll pay $1000 for this doormat."

The only way I could top this initial salvo is if I had, say, a picture of a giant box of Pocky from New Zealand. Oh wait....

Even anarchists like to Get Things Done.

2007-09-11T00:00:00-05:00

Spotted this while in New Plymouth on our recent vacation to New Zealand. Congratulations Google. You know you've arrived when even anarchists are saying, "Yeah, down with the fascist bourgeoisie ruling class and everything, but I've got a wife, 2.5 kids, a mortgage and a job and I can NOT be just deleting SPAM all day guys!"

Am I a shameaholic? Drunk on shameahol?

2007-09-11T00:00:00-05:00

I know I've discussed Twitter before on this blog and my original reaction was disgust. Why would I need that? Who could possibly need to know that I'm clipping my toenails while listening to 99 Luftballoons right now?

I'm ashamed now to admit that not only do I have a twitter account, I cross post my updates to this blog. My wife says she has lost all respect for me.

But let me tell you that the reason you don't respect me anymore (if you ever did), is that you're thinking about Twitter as a meatspace status message but it is much more than that! Why do I allow my self to be mocked in this manner?

In better news Shaleah is really excited to be a Nebraskan.

She made delicious stuffed peppers (and used uber-expensive orange ones).

Careful, there might be a joke in here

2007-09-10T00:00:00-05:00

When I was little and The Money Pit finally aired on broadcast TV I never understood the plot. Now that I've purchased a 102 year old house without a home inspection David Giler looks like an insightful genius.

We've been informed by our insurance company that we need to have the shingles on our garage replaced or they won't honor our policy. Other difficulties include previously unidentified water damage, foxhole sized divots in our backyard courtesy of Lucy and Thena, and muddy paw prints on every white surface on the entire property (courtesy of spider-pig).

Still, things are actually shaping up around the house I'm pursuing a new aesthetic that I like to call "sparse baroque" but in reality should probably be called barren.

...and they love David Hasselhoff

2007-08-28T00:00:00-05:00

Day 30:
Spent most of the day lounging around Wellington. Visited the Botanical Gardens and finished the Te Papa Museum. Shaleah took a long nap in the van at the park on Mt. Victoria. We also picked up my bike from the bike shop where I had taken it because my disc brakes were not working very well. It turns out that they did almost a complete tune-up of the bike which turned out to be much more expensive than I had expected but has resulted in a much better performing mountain bike.

We then drove out to a suburb of Wellington, called Karori where we camped for the night. There is a reportedly very nice mountain biking only park in Karori and we were anxious to try it out. Shaleah is getting very tired of camping in the van, and though we still have a week of vacation left it seems likely that we won't be camping much for the rest of the vacation.

Day 31:
Today, during our excellent mountain biking outing I felt a twinge of what Shaleah must feel all of the time. It was a twinge of disappointment that we don't have these wonderful, dedicated mountain biking trails and parks where we live in Nebraska. The Karori mountain biking park has wonderful terrain and the only bad part turned out to be the gale force winds at the top of the mountain that nearly blew us over and we had to walk our bikes until we got to a lower altitude. It could have been that the trail was more fun because my bike was now well tuned but still it was one of our best mountain biking outings of the trip.

After biking we set out for Waikanae where we once again imposed on some unsuspecting kiwis. Andrea's parents were gracious enough to let us stay overnight at their beautiful house with amazing views of the ocean. They also didn't complain when we ate all of their food, watched their television (rugby), and slept in their wonderful guest bedroom with a breathtaking view of the coast. Just like Andrea and Allison they were incredibly hospitable and were very patient while explaining the nuances of rugby. We counted ourselves very lucky to have met them.

Day 32:
Set out for Mt. Taranaki (neé Egmont) even though it was cloudy and not a great day for sightseeing. Maori legend says that Taranaki used to live with Mt. Tongariro and Nguruhoe in the central plateau until Taranaki was found canoodling with Tongariro's girlfriend and had to hightail it out to the coast.

We made a short hike and then set out to New Plymouth to spend some more time on the coast before we have to return to our land locked home in Broken Bow. Tomorrow we plan to set out for the Waitomo Caves to do some blackwater rafting, our last great adventure of the trip.

Day 33:
Blackwater Rafting can best be described as an activity for which you pay $90 to allow someone to dress you up hilariously in an ill-fitting wetsuit, take pictures of you mooning them through your inner-tube, direct you to do embarrassing things on command (which aren't actually needed on the excursion), and then lead you into a dark cave full of freezing water. But, in the end they give you some lukewarm soup and a bagel so it's not all bad. In fact, when you unselfconsciously get into the spirit of the adventure it becomes quite fun. Even the Germans in our rafting group were smiling (very efficiently). I asked them what the German word for blackwater rafting was and they replied, "Schwartzwasserraftebilteschungenheissencraftengeraftet." It made sense.

The Waitomo caves are very vast and despite the recent newspaper stories recounting one New Zealand doctor's horrific injury and subsequent three day evacuation from another cave Shaleah and I decided we'd catch the 2:15 blackwater rafting excursion. Our guides, Ja and Josh, led us through the dark enclosed spaces, occasional waterfalls, glow-wormed ceilings, and freezing water with aplomb. This was our most adventurous activity of the trip and turned out to be quite fun. I didn't even get injured.

Where we survive only by the kindness of others

2007-08-24T00:00:00-05:00

Day 23:
I'm not sure what we will do in Broken Bow when we can't spend the morning sitting in a coffee shop until we're finally ready to start the day at 11 am (or sometimes noon). Even though the winter here is quite temperate it is still pretty cold in the morning so we've taken to relaxing until the sun breaks through the clouds and begins to warm up the air. It makes me wonder if we can convince the clinic to only keep afternoon hours.

Drove from Taupo to Napier after a few hours in the coffee shop. The drive was quite pleasant and sunny as the Hawke's Bay region gets the most sunshine hours of any part of the country. A severe earthquake in 1931 knocked down all of the buildings in Napier and thus the rebuild created the Art-Deco capital of New Zealand. This area is also the New Zealand wine country. We spent most of the day walking around the city of Napier enjoying the good weather.

Day 24:
A morning that we rose early and surprise of surprises spent a few hours in the coffee shop. Drove to Hastings and checked in to The Rotten Apple Backpackers hostel. Not to put to fine a point on it but this was our worst mistake of the trip. Sure, we got a much needed shower and a place to do laundry but the place was run down and frankly smelled horrible. I should have invoked the "on paper we're rich, let's stay somewhere that doesn't smell like feet" rule, but we've been trying to live well within our means and so I mistakenly made the booking. Unfortunately this was beneath our means.

On the bright side today we got to meet Andrea, Allison, and Ava. Andrea was nice enough to show us around Hastings and Havelock North. We toured to Te Mata peak and to the Arataki honey factory. Also enjoyed a delicious round of apple ciders at the local cider house. The Hawke's Bay area is prime real estate for growing orchard fruit and, more recently, grapes that are made into wine.

After our fun afternoon our hosts were still gracious enough to take us out to dinner. It was great for Shaleah to finally have someone besides me to interact with and we both appreciated their wonderful hospitality. Ava is probably the best behaved 18 month old I've ever met, although maybe all kids in New Zealand are like that.

Day 25:
Wine ride. Although I don't partake in the sweet nectar of Bacchus as it were, I really enjoyed today. It was the first time we did a road ride on our bikes and we traversed over 30 km riding from winery to cheese factory to winery enjoying the sun and fresh air. It was very tiring but quite worth it.

After the ride we ate a delicious dinner at Andrea and Allison's house (they put on an excellent facade of appearing to not be sick of us yet) and Andrea made a delicious lemon meringue pie. It was nice to not be strangers in a strange land for a while.

Day 26:
Maps can give you a false sense of security. If you look at a map and there are only, say 5 trails it appears relatively straightforward. The other problem with most maps is that, being two dimensional, they don't really tell you what sort of insane incline you might be mountain biking down at a point when your brake pads probably need replacing.

Today's outing to Te Mata peak suffered from this debilitating combined map disease. The map only documents about 10% of the actual trails on the mountain and it doesn't grab you by the shoulders and shake you violently while yelling, "This might be too steep you uncoordinated bastard!" I enjoy walking, and I enjoy mountain biking but I don't enjoy hiking while pushing my bike. That is most of what we did this morning. Our saving grace being a nice gentleman who gave us directions and the always beautiful New Zealand countryside.

After a minor setback we traveled down the road to Masterton sheepishly ignoring some nice hikes because a fatigue factor has set in. This is not to be construed as complaining about a vacation which involves zero responsibility or deadlines but it can be tiring to do cardiovascularly intense activities almost everyday of a five week overseas excursion.

We ended up in Martinborough where we enjoyed a nice meal in the restaurant at the Martinborough Hotel and retired to the van.

Day 27:
Cold morning but quickly warming and becoming quite temperate. Early morning spent at the "dairy" which is sort of like a convenience store and cafe combined. Here, for the first time I stumbled upon a decent proposition for internet access. A single computer set up with free access and a container simply asking for donations. We gladly "paid" more for this internet because I appreciated the concept more than the $4 per hour we'd been paying at most internet cafes.

After this set out for Schoc Chocolates in Greytown. They have interesting and delicious combinations such as Strawberry, Black pepper, and milk chocolate, but it's probably not worth the $9 per bar that they charge. Anyway, we followed our chocolate fix with a drive down the coast and a hike to The Pinnacles which afforded our first views of the south island of New Zealand. We've decided not to visit the south island for two reasons. One, we're cold. Two, we only have 9 days left and we still haven't finished the north island.

Next stop on the itinerary brought us to a lighthouse on the coast and a local seal colony. I was able to get quite close to the seals and shoot some video footage until the camera ran out of battery.

Hotel evening with much deserved showers and a walk along the beach. We're nearing the end and it is starting to set in but we're remaining optimistic.

Day 28:
Today's goal was to bike the Rimutaka incline trail. I guess you could say that we accomplished that, but I walked my bike along a good portion of it. The trail follows the old Fell Engine railroad that used to traverse the Riutaka Range from the Wairarapa region to Wellington. The ride actually wasn't unduly strenuous but it rained some of the time and because it was about 1000 meters above sea level we got very cold as we descended back towards the start of the trail.

We did get to bike through a couple of tunnels and luckily our "torch" didn't run out of battery. And, even better, I only fell once because the trail was quite easy. After Rimutaka we drove to Wellington and walked around the city. We'll be spending a few days here and the weather should be wonderful.

Day 29:
Visited the Te Papa Museum (official museum of New Zealand) but we didn't finish all of the exhibits. Then we traveled to the Parliament building, took a tour and sat in on the parliamentary session. It had more of a city council feel than the government of a nation, but then again they're only governing 4 million people.

Wellington has some really great looking (and tasting) restaurants and we're trying one called Kai tonight. It is billed as a Maori fusion restaurant. Normally I would make fun of pretentious fusion restaurants but it came highly recommended by our Lonely Planet guidebook so I'm looking forward to it. The museum is open late tonight so we may go back through some more exhibits. Also bought tickets for a play for tomorrow evening. Should be fun.

The restaurant turned out to be a great experience with the owner playing the guitar and leading all of the diners in a Te Reo Maori language sing along. We had a wonderful time up until the point that our food arrived and Shaleah's chicken turned out to be essentially raw. It put a real damper on the evening.

I'd gladly pay $55 to be bludgeoned about the head!

2007-08-16T00:00:00-05:00

Day 17:
Began in the middle of the night actually when we were awakened by a security guard asking us to move our van. That is a risk you run when you are nomads I guess. At a more appropriate hour we visited a coffee shop for some relaxation while we waited for morning storms to pass. In the early afternoon we partook in some single track mountain biking near the Craters of the Moon Park. Some excellent trails but not quite as good as the Whakarewarewa forest.

After mountain biking we splurged on some internet access and on some boots. Then dinner at the Waterside Restaurant and another night in the van.

Day 18:
Another coffee shop morning. I've started reading the paper again, a habit I'd lost since medical school. Of course, it's the New Zealand paper so I don't really know anything about news in the U.S. but it's still fun.

Today we walked around the Craters of the Moon area except since it's New Zealand we actually had to pay $5 each to walk around in nature, but it was cool. Dinner was cooked by Shaleah in our hotel room and it was delicious.

Day 19:
Departed the Barcelona Hotel (in Taupo) at 10 am and drove towards Tongariro National Park, home of Mt. Tongariro, Nguruhoe, and Ruapehu. You might recognize Nguruhoe as playing the part of Mt. Doom in the Lord of the Rings trilogy. Anyway, on the way down we attempted to detour and bike what is called the 42 Traverse. This was decidedly unsuccessful. I tried to take us on a shortcut route and we made it about 15 minutes down the trail when we had to make a choice to turn back or ford a waist deep river. As a distant descendant of France I knew immediately when to retreat.

Plan B involved hiking to Taranaki Falls which provided many great views of both Nguruhoe and Ruapehu. Ruapehu actually houses two ski areas, Whakapapa and Turoa. After the 2 hour tramp we ate wood-fired pizza in National Park. Yes, that is the name of the town. National Park, New Zealand. You'll never guess what it's near. Before bed in the van (and a cold night's sleep) I finished reading The Man in the High Castle.

Day 20:
So far August 14th 2007 is the only day in August that I've ever been downhill skiing. That's right, today we hit the slopes of Mt. Ruapehu at the Whakapapa ski area. I had forgotten just how expensive it is to ski when you rent equipment and pay by the day for a lift ticket, but it was well worth it. Of course, this being New Zealand they gouge you for the shuttle ride to the base of the ski area. Actually, riding up is free but you have to pay to get down which makes me laugh. Still, a beautiful, rare, crystal clear day for the most part with 5 cm of new snow and breathtaking views of the surrounding plains.

There are no trees on any of these volcanic peaks so the whole ski area is basically one big run. It was amazing to look out from the top of the ski area onto the green plains spreading out below. Definitely a different feel than you get in Colorado. Like much of New Zealand the ski area is much less developed than the U.S. so Shaleah and I had to dust off our T-bar skills. We only fell off once in three rides, a pretty impressive percentage.

Managed to make it off the mountain injury free and procured a room at Howard's Lodge to avoid having to sleep in the van in sub-zero (celsius) temperatures again tonight. As Shaleah says, we made it through medical school and residency we shouldn't have to freeze our asses off. Or something like that, I forget how the exact quote went. Shaleah cooked dinner so we could feel like we were being thrifty and then we watched Judgement at Nuremburg on my laptop.

Day 21:
Shaleah is sick today. It is good that we didn't attempt the Tongaririo crossing or the 42 Traverse today. Neither of us felt up to it, although I'm not ill. We did hike to the Silica Rapids in the Tongariro National Park, though, and saw some great views of Mt. Nguruhoe. Even this two and a half hour hike tired both of us out. We definitely needed a day to rest before attempting the 42 Traverse.

On the bright side it was $10 pizza night at the Basekamp restaurant. I enjoyed the tandoori chicken, banana, cashew and yoghurt pizza and Shaleah downed the lamb, pumpkin, potato, and yoghurt pie. Good fuel for tomorrow.

Day 22:
42 is the answer to life, the Universe, and everything. It is also the distance in kilometers of the popular 42 Traverse trail. At least I'm told it is popular in the summer. Apparently hardly anybody rides it in the winter. Coincidentally we rode it today with another person, a bike shop owner from western Australia out on working holiday. Well, we didn't actually ride it together. The Aussie was so tough he rode his mountain bike to the trail (20 km), and then rode the trail. I cannot fathom how someone can do that as I was so fatigued at the end of the trail itself that I began to seriously wonder why we had paid $55 for the privilege of inflicting hours of pain upon ourselves. It was almost more than my couch potato body could handle and it gave me new respect for endurance athletes.

After returning and cleaning our filthy bikes we actually drove back to Taupo to stay because it would be warmer at lower elevation. Ate at the Thai Lotus and slept yet again in our trusty Bedmobile.

This just in: Vacation still awesome.

2007-08-11T00:00:00-05:00

Day 13:
Day of rest. We lounged around the holiday park in the morning and spent the afternoon in the cafe recovering from our previous day. In the evening we enjoyed The Simpsons Movie. Not much to say about that. You don't come to New Zealand to watch movies but the theater was warm and the movie was as good as most Simpsons episodes.

Day 14:
Injury day. Finally, a day without a cloud in the sky. Glorious, glorious sun and no showers all day. We planned an afternoon mountain biking excursion to the Whakarewarewa forest area, or whacky forest as I call it. I'm not sure if Prince likes to mountain bike but I'm pretty sure he had a hand in naming the trails here. They all have names like b rude not 2, luv 2 luv u, mad if u don't, and the 4nicator. Okay, I made that last one up. Anyway, the New Power Generation plays a set at the bottom of the mountain every day.

I think if asked to describe my mountain biking style I'd have to say George of the Jungle. Usually, I'm swinging along and everything is going fine but after a while, watch out for that tree. Today, I slipped in a giant mud puddle, stepped in a sinkhole and then cut my knee open when I hit it on the handlebars. In fact, I had more than a few crashes today but mountain biking just isn't as fun if you don't do it semi-recklessly. This time I got some action pictures.

After our trek we got a hotel room to nurse my wounds in and ate a wonderful italian dinner at Zanelli's restaurant.

Day 15:
Tramped around the Blue and Green lakes area just south of Rotorua. It was a very beautiful day with very few clouds. After the hike Shaleah visited the Buried Village (the Pompeii of the southern hemisphere). I did not join her because I had already read the whole story of the Mt. Tarawera explosion of 1886 when we were at the Rotorua museum.

Shaleah is having lots of back pain after our strenuous ride so we went back to the hotel room at a late lunch/early supper of crackers, cheese, and salami and watched TV until bedtime. Okay, not our most exciting day.

Day 16:
Drove to south to Taupo but stopped on the way at the Waiotapu thermal area where we saw the Lady Knox geyser go off at 10:15 am (because they pour soap in it). Walked around the park and took some cool pictures and saw some beautiful scenery, particularly the green hued lakes and pools.

Continued on south to Huka Falls (the Niagara Falls of New Zealand) and ate our lunch. Had to pay 20 cents to use the bathroom and wash our dishes in the sink. Probably worth it. We then drove through Taupo and availed ourselves of some of the local mountain biking trail maps. Satisfied with our haul we did a short in-town bike trek through the botanical gardens and down along the lake. Lake Taupo is the largest lake in New Zealand and is the result of a volcanic eruption. They say it was orders of magnitude larger than Krakatoa. Of course, there is no recorded history of the even since it happened 26,000 years ago so it's probably all supposition.

Ate dinner at a forgettable restaurant, thus far our only gustatory failure. Tomorrow is a new chance to eat too much.

It's almost like I've got nothing better to do

2007-08-07T00:00:00-05:00

Day 9:
Made the 180 kilometer trek to Hamilton, NZ this am. Lounged around the hotel room until we absolutely had to check out, then we drove south down motorway 1 from Botany. Visited the Hamilton Gardens which lacked the punch I imagine they have in summer and spring when things are in bloom but was still beautiful. We rode our bikes along the river for quite a distance after spending part of the afternoon reading Time and National Geographic.

After a brisk ride we went downtown and conducted some necessary internet business then ate at an Indian restaurant and walked along the downtown area. Hamilton is a surprisingly bustling city for being landlocked on a small island country. Of course it was Friday night so it may have been busier than usual.

Tomorrow we embark for Rotorua, site of the 2006 Mountain Biking World Championships.

Day 10:
Rain, rain, damnable rain all day! Spent the morning driving to Rotorua and walking through the Rotorua Mueseum. The smell of sulphur is persistent in this part of New Zealand and there are many hot springs and geysers. We quickly made our way to a cabin to wait out the rain. A lot of time spent reading and listening to podcasts. Not much else to be said about today.

Day 11:
Finally 4 solid hours of mountain biking in the morning and early afternoon. Overcast but no significant rain today. In fact, at times we actually saw the sun. The mountain biking trails around Rotorua are deserving of their hype. Very well organized with great terrain. As it's Sunday the trails were actually quite busy but by no means crowded. Much fun was had and we soaked our sore muscles in the thermal springs pools when we were finished.

I forgot to bring my camera today but we're going back tomorrow so I may get some pictures then. The forecast is intermittent rain showers for the next 5 days. However, by friday it's supposed to be sunny. I'm hoping we can avoid most of the rain and enjoy three or four more days of good trail riding. Shaleah cooked a delicious stir-fry for supper and we read our books in the van until bed. Obviously it is too rainy for our liking but we're making the best of it.

Day 12:
Today was an exhausting, wet, muddy, cold, bruising, blood-stained, some might say exxxxtreme, outdoor adventure! None of those adjectives sound particularly fun, admittedly, yet fun was had. Awoke early because all weather reports said it would rain all afternoon in Rotorua. We decided to not only bike up the trail but to ride our bicycles all the way to the trail as well. In retrospect this was perhaps not our finest idea. Shaleah and I were both pretty tired halfway up the mountain and Shaleah actually decided to end the day early. If you know Shaleah and her affinity for mountain biking you have some idea of how tiring our day was. We did, however, make it up the grueling climb to the start of the trail and we have a picture to prove it. It seemed that we were the only two mountain bikers on earth with the whole park to ourselves. We didn't see another soul the whole day, although the temperature and condition of the trail might have had something to do with that.

The park with the trails is an amazing place. The best analogy I can think of is that it's like a ski resort except the runs are mountain biking trails (no hikers or horses allowed), admission is free, and (unfortunately) there are no ski lifts. The number of trails is dizzying. After a morning of careening down the hill after a day long rain Shaleah and I (and our bikes) were covered in mud. Luckily there are laundry facilities at the holiday park where we currently reside.

In the evening Shaleah cooked a delicious meal and we spent the evening doing what we do every night, trying to take over the world! No actually, Shaleah reads about Lewis and Clark and I peck out this daily trip journal and peruse a couple of chapters ofThe World is Flat before retiring to bed around 8 pm. I don't know what Ben Bernanke is so worried about, unemployment is awesome.

This one is long

2007-08-03T00:00:00-05:00

Day 3:
We left Leigh in the early morning in search of a Flat White. That is the name of the New Zealand latte-like drink that Shaleah has become addicted to. We tracked one down at Pepper's Cafe in Mangawhai Village. It's actually quite amazing, because I didn't think there could be more coffee shops per capita than in Seattle, WA but New Zealand bests Seattle easily. These people are serious about their coffee....er...Flat White.

After Shaleah's caffeine fix we continued to drive north up the coast along the partially paved roads. The infrastructure here is very different and many of even the paved roads have bridges that are only one lane wide. This would never fly in the states because we couldn't be counted on to wait patiently for oncoming cars to cross the bridge.

We finally made it to the Mangawhai Cliffs walkway where we strolled around and enjoyed some more amazing views. It was actually quite temperate and the hike...er....tramp was not to difficult. This area of the country had some severe flooding as recently as one month prior to our visit and part of the hiking...er...tramping trail was washed out. We tramped back along the beach and were amazed at the sheer numbers of discarded shells on shore. In many places they outnumbered the rocks. It was pretty incredible.

Lunch was served overlooking the ocean despite the wind and we then packed up and drove to the city of Whangarei where we patronized the local internet cafe and ate a delicious meal at Reva's on the Waterfront. Our night was spent in a parking lot of the local information center where we dreamed of our mountain biking adventure the next day.

Day 4:
Alas, it was not to be. We awoke early on Day 4 to a torrential and persistent downpour which lasted most of the day and foiled our mountain biking plans. We holed up at the local coffee shop, Caffeine; Shaleah got her daily flat white, naturally, and we attempted to reconnoiter. We decided to stay at the Whangerhei Falls Backpackers hostel. After offloading our wares and getting our first shower of the trip we went hiking to the Abbey Caves. Of course, having no flashlight and tramping around in 3 inches of mud made this a less than successful excursion. However, the stop at Whangerhei Falls on our way back was very impressive. The rest of the day was spent doing laundry and relaxing. Mountain biking would have to wait for Day 5.

Day 5:
Muesli for breakfast resulted in a serous jaw workout. Today we bid goodbye to the hostel and set about getting a bike lock since our original didn't make the trip across the pacific. I also picked up a NZ to US power converter to charge our various electronic time wasting devices. After this short detour we actually set off towards our first mountain biking excursion. It turned out to be a short but pretty enjoyable jeep road ride that we managed to finish minutes before a torrential downpour. The bikes were stowed minutes before the countryside got a thorough drenching. We set off to our next destination and snapped a quick picture of a new rainbow.

Having been foiled in our previous cave excursion we stopped at the Waitiki glow-worm caves for a quick tour. It was actually quite impressive and a nice detour on our sojourn to the Bay of Islands. Arriving in Paihia around 6:00 pm we stopped and ate a delicious meal at Cafe No. 6 on the beachfront before retiring for the evening.

Day 6:
The sunrise today over the Bay of Islands was glorious. We got off to an early start today and we were at the mountain biking trail by 9:30 am. This proved fortuitous as we got lost on the trail and didn't finish until 1 pm. All in all, though, it was a very fun day. We enjoyed some biking and views of the ocean in the distance. We took several wrong turns and wound up biking a far greater distance than we had planned.

As an aside, we've become quite adept at living in a 12 ft x 6 ft space. When we return to our 3300 sq. ft. house we will be completely out of our element.

After biking we jaunted across the country to Omapere for a spectacular view across Hokianga harbor and the sand dunes of the Te Pouahi Reserve. Then on to the Waipoua forest to view Tane Mahuta (Maori God of the Forest) the largest remaining Kauri tree in New Zealand. It was impressive to behold. We then drove through the rest of the forest and down to Dargaville and Baylys Beach where we ate at the Funky Fish Cafe. Even if some of our plans get rained out there's no disputing that we've been eating like kings the entire trip. Even rain can't mess up great meals. Nighttime found us holed up in a parceled but not yet built upon housing development at the crest of a hill near Baylys Beach. It's a vagabonds life for us.

Day 7:
Travel day. Set out for Kai Iwi Lakes area on a rainy morning. The area was very beautiful but the trail was closed and it rained all morning so we caught up on our reading and Shaleah took a nap. We then set out south towards Auckland and drove most of the day. There are rainbows aplenty here in the New Zealand rainy season. I took pictures of several while Shaleah drove and listened to various podcasts. Our van, with 219,000 kilometers on it only has a CD player, no cassette deck.

The evening found us on the Whangaroa peninsula where we ate pizza and camped for the night. Tomorrow Shaleah and I will mountain bike at Shakespear park if the weather holds and then enjoy a well deserved hotel stay in Auckland.

The evening wound down and we viewed podcasts on my laptop. It's like television only smaller.

Day 8:
Last night was horrible. Apparently the parking lot we chose was the staging area for some New Zealand Army Reserve squadron or something. They showed up at midnight with their loud trucks and made noise all night long. Then they started marching and doing calisthenics at 4 am. We awoke to yet another day of intermittent showers. There was a break in the rain around 10 am long enough to take a ride through Shakespear park on the Whangaparoa peninsula north of Auckland. The ride traveled right through herds of sheep and cows and there were peacocks in abundance around the park.

The ride and the views were quite nice but the rain has caused spirits to flag so we trundled down through Auckland and got a nice hotel room with a shower at he Botany Motor Inn. Maybe it wasn't the best use of time but leisure is what vacation is about so we took a long nap in the afternoon and then watched some television.

The great thing about New Zealand tv is that while the news reporters aren't really serious journalists anymore than you local newsman they seem to realize this and they don't mind ribbing each other about it. I love watching the rugby highlights because I have no idea what's going on but everyone is obviously very excited about it. I'm sure New Zealanders feel the same about Nascar.

New Zealand Trip Journal

2007-07-28T00:00:00-05:00

Day 1:
Arrived in New Zealand at 4:40 am local time after a 12 hour flight from Los Angeles. I was not able to sleep on the flight but Shaleah got a couple of hours. Instead of sleeping I caught up on my movie viewing. On the flight I saw 300 (homoerotic with lots of shouting), Sunshine (philosophical with lots of shouting), Zodiac (fictional account of real events, no shouting), and Blades of Glory (ironically, not as homoerotic as 300).

After we deplaned it took us 2 hours to get through customs. They almost didn't give us visas because we had no return tickets. I really think that being white physicians from the U.S. saved our bacon here. They trusted us not to stay in New Zealand illegally after our visas expired. If we were from a poorer country I don't think they would have let us slide.

After we got through immigration we had to clear customs. The customs agents insisted that we clean all of the U.S. dirt from our bicycles. They then cleaned them with viruscide. I'm not really sure what virus can survive a 12 hour flight over the Pacific but that's probably why I'm not in charge of customs in New Zealand. This was a bit of an ordeal but eventually completed. We then met our Bedmobils representative at the Auckland airport and drove to get our camper van.

This is the part when Shaleah started to freak out. It was about 40 degrees fahrenheit, we could see our breath outside, we really had no plan for the rest of our month long trip, we forgot our bikelock, worst of all we had to learn to drive on the wrong side of the road, and we'd spent nearly $4000 to get there. Okay, I was a little freaked out as well. But, we were in New Zealand so to calm ourselves we drove down to a beautiful nearby beach and made our plan.

We ended up driving around North Auckland for hours trying to find a bike lock, which was exasperating but proved to be excellent driving practice. We finally gave up and headed north to Waiwera where we camped for the night with a beautiful beachside view. I was horribly jetlagged so I fell asleep at 7 pm with hopes of less anxious days ahead.

Day 2:
We awoke with the sun at 7 am and I shot some sunrise pictures. I spent the first few hours of the morning reading our Lonely Planet New Zealand guide and looking at our atlas. I guessed we might actually need some planning now that we were here. One thing that is great about New Zealand is the small land mass makes the "destination" density incredibly high. If you drive 10 km from where you are you'll see about five "point of interest" signs on the road there. For a boy from Nebraska it's quite impressive.

After we (mostly) assembled our bikes we visited the Waiwera Natural Hot Springs Spa. The 38 degree celsius water felt great after our cold morning but just like a hot tub it got too oppressive after a while. We retired to the cafe where we listened to the other visitors speak Italian and Japanese and I mourned my own monolinguisity. Following the cafe Shaleah got a massage at the spa while I relaxed. Then we loaded up the van (her name is Joy) and drove 40 km to Leigh and visited the Goat Island Marine Reserve. We were able to see lots of colorful fish swimming around the rocks near the shore. It doesn't take much effort to enjoy yourself here because you can't swing a dead cat without hitting a great view or interesting activity. We finished the day by eating carrot cake at a local cafe and planning Day 3.

Day 3:
We traveled to the Mangawhai cliff trail for a nice hike. Then we ate lunch on the cliffs and drove to Whangarhei where Shaleah took a nap and I posted this.

iTunes vs. emusic

2007-07-23T00:00:00-05:00

...and, oh yeah, there are still physical CD's as well, but I've grown to hate the packaging rather than thinking of it as a bonus. I assume this to be a function of the ease of obtaining cover art electronically. Maybe I hate the packaging because I just moved?

This is not a review of emusic or iTunes I just have something to say about both of them. I only recently started using the iTunes Store because although I've used iTunes and owned an iPod for over a year I refused to download music encumbered by DRM. Then along came iTunes Plus (the plus in this case does actually mean it is better), and suddenly you can download DRM free music from the iTunes Store, but only artists under the EMI label.

The irony of this is readily apparent. iTunes succeeded where everyone else had failed in part because Steve Jobs convinced all of the major labels to sell music through iTunes. Now, although iTunes Plus sells DRM-free music it actually has less selection than emusic even though emusic includes none of the major labels because (as of today) none of the indie labels are able to sell their music in DRM-free format via iTunes Plus. So I can get Neon Bible DRM free via emusic but not through iTunes Plus.

In the end both are available, you don't get barred from emusic for downloading from iTunes but for now I can say that I prefer emusic. Take that for what it's worth and give it a try if you like.

Enter the octagon

2007-07-21T00:00:00-05:00

This month's Gaucast answers the age old question, "Where my dogs at?" Apparently, the answer is, "On the roof, barking like idiots at nothing in particular."

Gaucast #8 (Veranda dogs)

We have intro music by Midlake and outro music by Spoon. Enjoy.

We went to a giant volcano.

2007-07-20T00:00:00-05:00

Here are some pictures of our recent outing to Mt. Rainier. It was a little cloudy that day but still very beautiful.

...and this, children, is where Giardia comes from.

Squinty, Squinty.

I have heard your pleas of more "crouching" photos and they are answered. Behold!

No updates about the status of my facial hair, but by way of monologue I am still editing Gaucast #8, working on a post about emusic vs. the iTunes Store, and enjoying some "real" mountain biking. It's funny because all those other times I've gone mountain biking it sure felt real. What an immersive virtual reality life I must lead.

The story so far.

2007-07-08T00:00:00-05:00

Here are some pictures of our recent vacation excursions.

View of Mt. Ranier on the descent to SeaTac.

Climbing Mt. Pilchuck.

Jennifer, Valerie, and Keith. 4th of July at the lake.

As always, more photos here.

Hello, I'm Keith, and I have a blog that I don't update.

2007-07-02T00:00:00-05:00

This is what we've been doing instead of unpacking after our move.

"I am highly distrustful of your electronic daguerreotype."

Sunset at the park pond.

Threatening the sound barrier

2007-06-17T00:00:00-05:00

As promised...

Gaucast #7 (Pez Dispenser)

Quitting medicine, becoming a photographer

2007-06-16T00:00:00-05:00

Apparently my absence has riled up the internets.

Well I'm not back in heavy rotation (you'll need to wait a few weeks for that) but I thought I'd post some pictures I recently took.

For our upcoming trip to New Zealand I'll be getting a new camera. Expect to be overwhelmed. And, yeah, Gaucast #7 is still being edited on my new one of these.

This is some of the best scientific work by a lawyer I've seen.

My iTunes collection probably rates a 4.2 using this methodology. Chiefly because of this song.

As an aside, recently my iTunes "Overhyped British Post-Punk" index is easily a five. I'm so damn gullible.

Beyond Ether Dome

2007-05-21T00:00:00-05:00

So, as you probably know because you read JonesyAlonesy and comment on that blog way more than you comment on this blog, *cough*Kat*cough*, we were in Boston, MA this last week. We were lucky enough to visit the Ether Dome at Massachusetts General Hospital. Please see reenactment below.

I'm in ur Ether Dome anesthetizing ur d00ds!

St. Francis of Assisi (posted for Matt Standridge, everyone else may move along.)

It was beautiful all week, until Wednesday when the Nor'easter came.

Gyroball!

More pics available here as always.

The Yumanity has an arch nemesis...

2007-05-12T00:00:00-05:00

...and its name is JonesyAlonesy. Full of posts that are the antithesis of posts about the Phoenix Suns.

Actually it's mostly a list of complaints about me. Does there really need to be a whole blog devoted to that?

I want this to be the epitaph on my headstone

2007-05-11T00:00:00-05:00

So today I got the following email from a family member who shall remain nameless. My response follows the email.

Subject: FW: PLEEEEEEASE REEEEEAD! IT WAS ON GOOD MORNING AMERICA TODAY SHOW....

To all of my friends, I do not usually forward messages, But this is from my friend Pearlas Sandborn and she really is an attorney. If she says that this will work it will work. After all, what have you got to lose?

READ BELOW.

SORRY EVERYBODY.. JUST HAD TO TAKE THE CHANCE!!! I'm an attorney, and I know the law. This thing is for real. Rest assured AOL and Intel will follow through with their promises for fear of facing a multimillion-dollar class action suit similar to the one filed by PepsiCo against General Electric not too long ago.

Dear Friends,
Please do not take this for a junk letter. Bill Gates is sharing his fortune. If you ignore this you will repent later. Microsoft and AOL are now the largest Internet companies and in an effort to make sure that Internet Explorer remains the most widely used program, Microsoft and AOL are running an e-mail beta test. When you forward this e-mail to friends, Microsoft can and will track it (if you are a Microsoft Windows user) for a two week time period. For every person that you forward this e-mail to, Microsoft will pay you $245.00, for every person that you sent it to that forwards it on, Microsoft will pay you $243.00 and for every third person that receives it, you will be paid $241.00. Within two weeks, Microsoft will contact you for your address and then send you a cheque.

thought this was a scam myself, but two weeks after receiving this e-mail and forwarding it on, Microsoft contacted me for my address and within days, I received a cheque for US$24,800.00. You need to respond before the beta testing is over. If anyone can afford this Bill Gates is the man. It's all marketing expense to him. Please forward this to as many people as possible. You are bound to get at least US$10,000.00.

We're not going to help them out with their e-mail beta test without getting a little something for our time. My brother's girlfriend got in on this a few months ago. When I went to visit him for the Baylor/UT game. She showed me her check. It was for the sum of $4,324.44 and was stamped "Paid In Full".

>>PRIVACY/CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE REGARDING CONFIDENTIAL >>INFORMATION

This e-mail (the information and any accompanying documents) is intended only for the personal and confidential use of the intended recipient. It may also contain information that is privileged. If the reader of this message is not the intended recipient or the employee or agent responsible for delivering it to the intended recipient, you are hereby notified that you have received this information in error. If you have received this information in error, please notify the sender and do not copy, distribute, disclose the contents or use the information for any purpose. Please destroy such a communication and its contents immediately and delete them from your email. Any review, dissemination, distribution,copying or action taken in reliance on the contents of such a communication is strictly prohibited.

Why did you fall for this stupid chain letter scam? The next time you think about forwarding something like this to me why don't you send me a nice personal hello email instead. Falling for this just makes you look greedy and insensitive.

Let me show you how to spot a scam email.

1.) WTF is the GOOD MORNING AMERICA TODAY SHOW?

2.) Did Bill Gates write anything in the body of the message? Why would he pay you for forwarding a message from some guy who knows an attorney? Why would he pay you period when he could be buying AIDS drugs for African orphans?

3.) Two seconds of Googling for the name Pearlas Sandborn leads you to many sites detailing the hoax like this one http://www.hoax-slayer.com/ms-money-giveway-hoax.html

4.) Nobody but Starr Jones says, "I'm an attorney and I know the law."

5.) AOL and Intel are not companies run by Bill Gates. In fact Intel is mentioned once and then not again. AOL is mentioned twice but both conflict with the original premise, i.e. that Bill Gates will be paying you for forwarding email.

6.) Bill Gates gives away his fortune to charity causes, not to people who forward email indiscriminately.

7.) Class action lawsuits are not filed between large companies like Pepsi and General Electric. Class action lawsuits are filed by a group of citizens against another defendant usually a company. Hence the term class action.

8.) The first sentences of legitimate emails do not start "Please do not take this for a junk letter." That is how junk letters start. They also don't usually have multiple spelling and grammatical errors.

9.) AOL couldn't care less how Internet Explorer does in the marketplace. You may not care or remember but AOL bought Netscape in 1998. Big companies don't work together to give money away they work to make it. If they give money away their stockholders can sue them.

10.) Does it make you a little concerned that Microsoft can track every email you send? Yeah, so either they can't or maybe you shouldn't be sending so many emails to your "Celine Dion fan club mailing list."

11.) Let's do some quick math: This email was forwarded to 24 people. If they each also forward to 24 people and so on within 7 iterations adds up to $11 trillion. The national debt is only $8.8 trillion. Bill Gates net worth is estimated at $53 billion. That's a lot but I bet this email made it through more than 7 iterations.

12.) The idiot that forwarded it to you used his company's email account which adds a privacy notice that requires you to delete the email if you were not the primary intended recipient.

13.) It comes from Nigeria.

...and there you have it. Is forwarding this crap particularly harmful? No, but it does tell me you don't care enough about me to consider my time too important to waste deleting ridiculous forwarded emails in order to get to the emails from you that I really do want to read. I want to read your important emails, that's why I'm in your addressbook, but if I have to wade through ten pieces of spam for one honest communication it's not worth it to me.

...the trouble with (audio) levels

2007-05-06T00:00:00-05:00

Two points for anyone who gets that sci-fi joke in the title. Shaleah of course, would, but she also knows what the T stands for in James T. Kirk. In this episode of Gaucast we recorded live and the audio levels were wonky and hard to fix despite my best efforts.

Anyway, enjoy this latest Gaucast where we discuss Jeffrey's wedding, R&B super-group 112, Mark Cooper, The Surreal Life, the NBA, and Scott Stapp.

Gaucast #6 (Peaches and Creed)

Would a photo blog be a phlog?

2007-05-04T00:00:00-05:00

Pictures of our recent trip to Asheville, NC for my brother's wedding. More photos can be found here. I didn't have the will to think up stupid captions this time. Enjoy the phlogging!

It's a nice day for a wet wedding

2007-04-25T00:00:00-05:00

For you keeping score at home that is the second Billy Idol reference on wrayblog. The first can be found here.

Super (recursive) link paragraph:
This coming weekend Shaleah and I will be attending the nuptials of my younger brother Jeffrey and his betrothed Kat. Go wish them the best on their wedding blog. Nerds! They've got a rockin' rhythm and a high-tech sound.

Anyway, here is the forecast for the weekend in Asheville, NC. Luckily I'll be dressed like Aquaman. I never go out in public without my "formal" codpiece.

I kid, of course, I'm very much looking forward to the wedding and it will be great to see my family and to meet Kat's family. We're planning to record a live episode of the Gaucast, which should be posted by early July when I finally get some time to edit it.

I was going to make this post about how I've failed as a scientist but lucky you I'll save that for next time.

ATHF for Breakfast

2007-04-21T00:00:00-05:00

This morning Shaleah and I went out for breakfast at the Egg & I and our server, Loy (he lost his D in a tragic blimp accident over the Orange Bowl on New Years Day) drew the following awesome picture on our ticket.

Who knew Master Shake and Meatwad hung out at the Egg & I.

Ask the Smartest Man You Know: DVD ripping

2007-04-14T00:00:00-05:00

Why push the very popular house pictures off of the top slot for this post that no one cares about? Simple, I haven't posted anything in a week except links and even though everyone else loathes these posts I have great fun writing them. Of course, since only one person ever emails me questions I don't get to answer many.

Anyway, if you haven't though about this topic then good for you. Your lack of foresight might save you a lot of unnecessary work as in a few years we'll all be done with physical discs for music and movies. If you have thought about it then you probably got so exasperated you gave up. Maybe it's time for another try?

Dear SMIK
What is your prefered method of ripping dvds (into itunes if possible)?

Answering this question as it relates to my current preference is not difficult, but there are currently many limitations in this area that might give you pause about embarking on this project (as a means to archive DVD's you already own of course). Why would you rip DVD's you got from your Netflix account, that would be illegal?

The crux of the issue basically comes down to how future-proof do you want your DVD rips to be? You see, with current storage limitations being what they are it is very hard to justify ripping the DVD's (resulting in the original MPEG-2 file) and not subsequently encoding them into a more compressed format (MPEG-2 is already somewhat compressed).

The problem exists because although our audio equipment has reached technological maturity to the point that you can scientifically prove that most people's ears and brain cannot distinguish between rock music encoded at 256kbps mp3 and the original CD wav file, the eye is a much more complicated organ than the ear. Subsequently the amount of information necessary to present a picture at 24 frames per second combined with an audio track is exponentially greater than audio alone. This is even ignoring that most people listen to music in stereo but frequently listen to the audio track of their DVD's in 5.1 Dolby surround sound.

Therefore, even if you ripped the MPEG-2 video off of your DVD's and did not compress it for storage but dedicated a giant array of hard disks to store your video (a DVD is about 4 GB, your average 60 GB hard disk would only store 15 movies) you would still not be future proof because the next television you buy will undoubtedly be capable of at least 720p HDTV (720 lines of vertical resolution) whereas current DVD's are only 480p (480 lines of vertical resolution).

A lot of this is oversimplification but to really dig into it would confuse me and you. I've tried to understand HDTV. It's not worth it. Suffice it to say, a current generation DVD will likely look very blocky on a HDTV you buy in 5 years (not to mention what it would look like if you compressed the video further).

Having prefaced with all of that my personal preference is to use Handbrake. I use the Mac version but there is also a windows version. The good thing about Handbrake is that it doesn't confuse you as much as some ripping programs. It automatically detects the disc and gives you an easy list of what to rip by length. You then set a couple of parameters and commence ripping.

If you are ripping and encoding for a video ipod this is a pretty good tutorial (it shows the mac screenshots but the windows layout is essentially the same). However, if you want to watch your archived DVD's on your TV or computer you should increase the bitrate and the resolution of the encoded video. Adjusting those is really probably too complicated to go into right now.

What I recommend is that you do a couple of test encodes and watch it on your target (tv, computer, whatever) and see how it looks. If it's too blocky try increasing the bitrate, if it looks too upscaled try increasing the resolution. Two pass encoding improves the quality but takes twice as long. You should probably just look around in the program and use the help to figure things out. Trial and error is your friend.

As for what format to encode into I use vanilla MPEG-4 (.mp4 is the file-type). This probably provides the smallest file size for files that are still playable on multiple machines and even some DVD players if you burn the resulting file to CD. For me a movie takes up about 500 MB after encoding (but that is for my ipod and thus at a fairly low bitrate). I have watched these files on my (standard definition) television and they are not bad but would probably look horrible on an HDTV. Now that things like the Apple TV exist that can play h.264 encoded videos on your HDTV you could consider using h.264 instead of vanilla MPEG-4 (files will be smaller at the same quality), but you will limit yourself when trying to play it on multiple targets.

Finally (finally!), I usually encode the audio at around 160 kbps and it sounds pretty good but it's not 5.1 surround. After your final file is encoded just use the import function of iTunes and you should be able to view them. Remember that when you import a video into iTunes it copies it into the library so you now have two copies. View the iTunes copy and then delete the original.

Sincerely,
The Smartest Man You Know

House Party

2007-04-08T00:00:00-05:00

Enjoy some pictures of our recently purchased home in Broken Bow, NE. Now we just need jobs...and furniture.

I guess we have to change our name to Scheffler.

The plasma TV goes above the fireplace.

There is no electricity, but it's sure cozy.

Is it April already?

2007-03-31T00:00:00-05:00

Apologies in advance for my tardiness. This Gaucast was recorded almost a month ago now. I'm just getting around to editing and posting it. This is the episode when all the critics agreed that Gaucast went completely off the rails.

Gaucast #5 (Iron Eagle 4 Jesus)

His blog is all dog pictures!

2007-03-31T00:00:00-05:00

Shut it Grandma! Here are some pictures of sunsets too!

Those are horses in the foreground, not velociraptors.

We would like to tell you the next Gaucast is on the way.

Robots do my blogging

2007-03-24T00:00:00-05:00

Obviously I'm too lazy for this blogging stuff. Who has time to post little comments about their NCAA tournament bracket?

That got me to thinking. I know a bit about computers. Computers are supposed to help me be lazy by doing things for me. How can I use this to get robots to update my blog for me?

So, I signed up for a del.icio.us account, added a button to my browser and set up Blogger to post my del.icio.us bookmarks into the right hand column. You will probably see it over here ---->

Voila! Now you, the wrayblog reader, can benefit from my aimless internet wandering everyday by dutifully following my links. Be warned, however, I bookmark a metric assload of pages about computers that you will likely find opaque and irrelevent.

Chasing "Tail"

2007-03-06T00:00:00-06:00

I hope to cover this as a topic in a future Gaucast but I wanted to post about it here because I've been thinking a lot about macroeconomics lately. Funny that, as I can barely comprehend what the hell is going on with my IRA and 401(k) but books like The Wisdom of Crowds, Freakonomics, and The Long Tail are capturing my interest lately. The great thing about these books is that you don't have to really understand the math and science behind them to understand the general concept.

The general concept of The Long Tail is that as traditional commerce becomes (god, I hate this word) e-commerce the advantage of not having to pay for traditional stores is the ability to offer virtually everything. Taken to the extreme you get customers scattering into tiny niches of products that interest them rather than everyone buying the same thing because that is what's available. You really have to read the book to get the full theory but what it offers is promising. Eventually we may not have to suffer through 10 Norbits for every Children of Men, (just to take Hollywood as an example) because you don't have to please the lowest common denominator to make money in a world where it doesn't cost you anything to store or distribute the movie.

I've been thinking a lot about how businesses run lately and something really bugs me about Product (RED). According to this Advertising Age article Bono's plan to get companies (who need to show significant growth every quarter to satisfy their shareholders) to donate 50% of their profits for each Product (RED) item, has fallen significantly short of the goal. i.e. they spent (some estimate) $100 million promoting Product (RED) and they have raised $18 million. Whoops, I guess AIDs in Africa has bested us again because last I checked that means you lost $82 million. Now, I realize that we don't actually have to pay AIDs $82 million but I don't think $18 million is really going to eradicate it.

This is probably a function of the fact that the companies are keeping half of the profit. Now, admittedly, they make these products and need to recoup some of their outlay for manufacturing but couldn't it be 50% of the sales? That would be a serious commitment for a company and not just a free publicity ride. Or, better yet, instead of buying that ridiculously gaudy Red Razr you could donate 50% of what you'd spend on it to charity. I'm Sally Struthers.

Ask the Smartest Man You Know: Compressed Audio II

2007-03-05T00:00:00-06:00

Since the response to the last AtSMYK was so overwhelming I thought I'd post another question and answer session. A follow up question from the previous post.

Do I want to be ripping into iTunes using mp3 encoder or AAC encoder?

The short answer is that it probably doesn't matter.

If you ask 4 people you'll probably get 4 different answers even though it's a binary question. As far as quality is concerned, assuming you use a high-enough bitrate (I prefer 192 kbps but I've not done rigorous research) you probably won't be able to tell the difference between the two.

If you are concerned about file sizes AAC will generally create smaller files at the same bitrate but it depends upon many variables. The thing that confuses most people is that they think Protected AAC (what you get when you buy from iTunes) and AAC are the same thing. They're not. Although you'd never likely know the difference if all you used was iTunes and an iPod.

Essentially the answer comes down to this. You should probably keep ripping into the format that you have most of your songs in. The iPod will probably always play mp3 and AAC files but other players may not. Mp3 is a pretty safe bet (again at higher bitrates) because it's so entrenched that for at least the next decade all players will have to support it for backward compatibility reasons (just like Word 2007 has to be able to open Word 4 files). AAC probably won't go away either but its future is slightly less certain than mp3.

A good adage to adhere to when speculating upon the advance in technology is that the most general case will always win eventually because the hardware will catch up to it. So eventually we'll all be downloading our music in 70 megabyte per song lossless format created from the original master recording over our WiMAX connection and storing it on our 1 terabyte capacity iPods (but I'm betting those players will still know how to decode mp3's).

Ask the Smartest Man You Know: Compressed Audio

2007-02-28T00:00:00-06:00

Today I debut a new (recurring) section on the blog which I've humbly titled Ask the Smartest Man You Know. Most of these questions will be about technical issues but the four readers of this blog are encouraged to send me questions about anything you think I might know something about. You may leave your question in the comments or email it to me. If you read this blog you already know my email address.

The first questions comes from a J.S. in Omaha, NE.

if i rip a cd into itunes, then burn the cd is that quality any better/worse than using software (nero) to strictly "copy" the cd from the disc to a cd-r?

thanks

First, a formality. Always, always capitalize the T in iTunes. You don't want to make Steven P. Jobs angry do you?

Now, with that out of the way on to the actual answer.

Technically, yes copying a CD directly is higher quality than ripping and encoding to mp3 and then decoding back to CD. Although if you have iTunes set to rip into mp3 with very high bitrate (192 kbps or higher) it will be almost impossible to tell unless you're using a very high end audio system for playback. Some people say they can tell the difference but I have never been able to. Typically these people are the idiots that pay $1,000 for gold plated audio cables and vacuum tube amps because the sound is "warmer."

Still you do lose some fidelity when you encode CD-DA into mp3 (ripping in iTunes) and then decode the mp3 file back into CD-DA (burning a CD in iTunes).

If you want the files in iTunes anyway it's probably worth the tradeoff of fidelity loss because if you just copy the CD you don't have the files in your iTunes library, obviously. If all you really want is the CD and don't care if you can listen in iTunes then you should just be copying the CD directly.

If you want the best of both worlds (copy of CD in hand and songs in iTunes) without fidelity loss, and you have gobs and gobs of hard disk space you could consider setting iTunes to rip your CD's to ALAC (Apple Lossless Audio Codec), which as the name implies is lossless of any original fidelity, but it takes up about the same space as a regular CD (i.e. about 500 MB per album)!

There is another alternative which is to use FLAC (Free Lossless Audio Codec). The advantage of FLAC (in addition to being Lossless like ALAC) is that it is not proprietary and slightly superior in quality to ALAC. The major (and it is major) disadvantage of FLAC is that iTunes (and the iPod) do not support it. That's a deal breaker for most people given how great iTunes is for organizing your music collection.

Secret Tip: There are rumors circulating that the next version of Mac OS X will have native support for FLAC. This could mean it will find its way into iTunes but I wouldn't hold my breath (especially on Windows).

Stay Tuned for the next laboriously mind-numbing installment of AtSMYK!

Vacation, all I ever wanted.

2007-02-25T00:00:00-06:00

Here are some pictures from our recent vacation to Summit County.

I told you only pictures where I'm backlit!

This one appears to have been taken by a real photographer.

Snowshoeing at Mayflower Gulch.

Tim Hardaway hates Gaucast

2007-02-24T00:00:00-06:00

It's time again for the lowest common denominator. Throw decorum out the window and listen!

Gaucast #4 (Tim in a Box)

Are you ready for a vacation?

2007-02-05T00:00:00-06:00

Yes, from my laborious blog posting schedule. Shaleah and I have not had a true vacation since our wedding over six months ago. Thus, we are both very much looking forward to taking vacation this week as we go to Keystone, CO. We'll be using our ski passes and Shaleah will get to work out her new snowboard. I can't wait. I don't think I've looked forward to a vacation this much since our family took that train to Hawaii.

What else have I been doing? I might devote an entire blog post to my ruminations on this issue but I've been thinking about data longevity a lot lately. I've been doing a lot of leg work to ensure that all of our pictures, music, movies, documents and podcasts are around for the long haul. Ironically this puts me in the position of ideologic congruence with my mother. Admittedly my mother never worried about distributed network offsite backups with multiple levels of redundancy but she always espoused the view that someday we would be thankful that she had taken all of those family pictures. In that way we finally agree. I want my wedding video and the first Gaucast to be available for my grandchildren to enjoy (or at least to mock mercilessly) and that takes some serious planning in this age of digital information stored on media that physically decay.

Did that sound in any manner nerdy?

I'm on a Mexican Radio

2007-01-21T00:00:00-06:00

If you are a masochist feel free to click the link and enjoy the pain.

Gaucast-Episode #3 (Semi-Professional Mexican)

So this is the New Year?

2007-01-15T00:00:00-06:00

Is this blog quickly becoming irrelevant? Was it ever relevant to begin with? Was my last post really 12/30/2006? Halfway through January and no posts yet. That's pretty poor output even by my low standards. That's less than 25 posts a year. Standridge even made frequent posting a New Years resolution and that guy only has one hand! So what's wrong with yours truly?

I guess I've been kind of busy but mostly my days are so monotonous that great blog ideas are few and far between. Seriously, how many posts about dogs can you people stomach? I thought so. Plus, I don't have an object of obsession (The Phoenix Suns) or a deity (the Phoenix Sons of God) to blog about.

So, while I've never felt comfortable using this blog as a brain dump, I do promise to post more often even if it becomes a twitteresque status log.

I'm looking forward to a couple of things upcoming. In no particular order they are signing a contract for my new job, skiing with my friends, visiting Greeley friends for the first time in two months, and recording episode #3 of Gaucast. I'll probably post the next episode of Gaucast as well even if no one listened to the last one.

Ski Wray, CO

2006-12-30T00:00:00-06:00

So we've had two blizzards in the last two weeks. The first one we weren't ready for. You may have seen this picture of DIA. The second one was less severe but even so we have lots of snow. So today we went cross-country skiing with the dogs.

Christmas Picture

First Blizzard of 2006

Shaleah's Christmas present. Sushi made from chocolate.

I fell down accidentally and decided to take a picture from where I lay.

Thena would not stay in the picture but Lucy loves the snow.

Apparently their fur keeps them pretty warm. They didn't want to stop playing.

Second blizzard of 2006. Lucy is a little more cautious than Thena. Everyone had a good time though.

Useless audio

2006-12-29T00:00:00-06:00

Please, please, please do not click these links unless you are very interested in hearing three idiots talk about idiotic things for two straight hours. You have been warned! (You will need quicktime.)

Gaucast-Episode #1 (In The Closet)
Gaucast-Episode #2 (Buying A Plane)

Christmas Letter

2006-12-16T00:00:00-06:00

Where to begin? I suppose I should start with an exhaustive list of excuses explaining my absence from the blogosphere recently. Basically it boils down to one excuse. I've been busy trying to find a job. Apparently, everybody in the food service industry feels I'm overqualified to serve their patrons a delicious meal, quickly. I kid, of course, but Shaleah and I have had some difficulty deciding where live and work next year.

Still, I promised to write a Christmas letter this year and being the fan of entropy that I am the least energy state I could conjure was a Christmas letter disguised as a blog post....in haiku form.

No Christmas lights here
The neighbors are all confused
I'm just too lazy

The war on Christmas
Created by cable news
Kudos Hannity

Married in July
Hot as hell in Seattle
Air conditioning

Shaleah tells me
"Let's work less for less money"
Goodbye new ipod

Two dogs is too much
Lucy ate Harry Potter
It was delicious

My wife a pilot?
Shaleah learning ground school
No crashes so far

Jeffrey a lawyer?
Many jokes so little time
Ambulance chaser

Not all blogs equal
Everyone reads Kat Fancy
Fashion trumps "The Suns"

Planning vacation
Could we bike in New Zealand?
Watch out for Hobbits

Graduation soon
Twenty-eight years no real job
Life a harsh mistress

Next year Hanukkah
Celebrated in free verse
Because I hate you

KeithFancy

2006-11-26T00:00:00-06:00

Let's face it. There are two types of people in this world. Those who read KatFancy and those who read that other blog. Those who are this guy, and those who are this guy. Gallant, Goofus, etc...

Essentially, either you have a picture on the internet of something you've recently done to your hair or you don't. As I fully believe this is an internet meme par excellence I present this.

Hey, it's that dude from Lost! He should look at that map.

Things are well in the land of too many dogs. Here's proof:

They have lasers for eyes!

Two Dog Night

2006-11-08T00:00:00-06:00

After a blow to the head removed my short term memory we decided to get another puppy. We call her Lucy, although her full name is Lucita Puppita Jones. Her name has no accompanying paragraph but I think in Esperanto it means "whines until your head explodes like in Scanners."

More pictures:

I'll post pictures of our recent trip to Estes Park soon.

Hey! You! Look at this Dog.

2006-10-30T00:00:00-06:00

You want it when?

I cannot speak your crazy moon language.

I plan to chew something of enormous emotional value to you.

Conformity...or a eulogy for the Rio Karma

2006-10-30T00:00:00-06:00

When I started this blog I promised that I wouldn't do any posts about technology. Since I broke that rule with my post about my computer monitor I thought I'd post this personally embarrassing revelation:

I'm thinking about buying an ipod.

Why is this an embarrassing confession?

For starters I already have a perfectly serviceable hard drive based music player of which I've only used 6 gigabytes of the 20 gigabyte capacity. I also happen to not own a Macintosh or a Windows computer. Anyone who knows me fairly well (and if you're reading this blog I'll assume you do) knows that I like Linux. It's open, it's free of cost and it's not owned by one company. Everything Mac OS X, iTunes and the ipod are not. Yet, in my old age I've grown less patient and I think I'm coming to the point in my life where I'm willing to give up a little cash and a little control if things will just work.

Here's an example:

Steps to get a CD's worth of music onto my Rio Karma:
1.) Rip CD
2.) Encode tracks into ogg format
3.) Fix the track tag info that invariably didn't get filled in right
4.) Connect Rio Karma to dock over ethernet
5.) Open Rio Music Manager Lite (java program that enjoys random crashes)
6.) Attempt to transfer tracks to Rio Karma
7.) Watch in horror as transfer freezes 6 tracks into the transfer
8.) Quit Rio Music Manager Lite
9.) Reopen Rio Music Manager Lite
10.) Transfer tracks

Steps to get a CD's worth of music onto an ipod:

1.) Open iTunes
2.) Rip and encode CD to mp3
3.) Connect ipod
4.) Sync

Maybe I'm exaggerating some, but it's become so irritating to transfer music to the player that I've stopped doing it. Thus, I can't listen to my newest music unless I'm physically at my computer and that sucks.

So maybe I'll be arriving late to the ipod/iTunes bandwagon, and perhaps that makes me a conformist. But I'm thinking about switching not because the ipod is iconic but because I've realized that easy management of your media is a HUGE draw. Basically I'm switching for the benefits of iTunes. It just so happens that the ipod is the only media player that works with iTunes, but you can bet I'll be replacing those conspicuous white earbuds the first chance I get.

Appropriately, Rio doesn't even make portable digital audio players anymore.

State Intelligence Briefing

2006-10-18T00:00:00-05:00

Here is an interesting link to a ranking of all 50 states by "intelligence."

The methodology is based solely on metrics of public school performance or expenditures per student. It would seem that this might skew the data somewhat and it makes me wonder if this is less of a barometer of "intelligence by state" and more of a yardstick for which states are best for families with school age children as two of the 21 factors are Public Elementary and Secondary School Revenue per $1,000 Personal Income and Percent of Public Elementary and Secondary School Current Expenditures used for Instruction.

Alright, enough for the serious portion of the post. Now I'd just like to point out that my brother lives in the dumbest state in the union, but if the District of Columbia were included in the list Arizona might not hold such a dubious honor.

Still if this is correct you might want to move to a "Top 25" smart state lest your great-great-great-great-grandson become a Morlock.

Only Guy Pearce or, possibly Kevin Costner, can save us.

Why didn't they use Cactus Where Your Heart Should Be?

2006-10-08T00:00:00-05:00

Because I completely lack my own ideas I'm holding a blog contest (a la The Yumanity). Luckily for you it involves dog food!

I hold firmly to the belief that "selling out" is an artists right. Just because you, as a person who enjoys the artists work, have attached certain emotions to a song you love doesn't mean the artist is betraying you by selling the rights to said song to an advertiser. The artist poured their time, blood, sweat, tears, and likely some insoucient mandolin into that track you love and it is theirs to do with as they please. Jack White can write songs for Coca Cola, Ben Gibbard can sell you sneakers, and lord knows you can't sell ipod nanos or score a decent movie trailer without some indie streeet cred track.

I predict that within five years there will be a direct pipeline connecting Myspace and Madison Avenue.

Having said that I've got to ask, "A dog food commercial, WTF?" Here's where the contest comes in. Go to this link, and watch the video for Cesar's awesome new dog food. I must presume it's awesome based on the hairy rat's (I mean dog's) reaction to it. It appears the dog food breakthrough is that the food is already partially predigested. Owning a dog I know this is preferrable because the dog never actually chews it's food.

Anyway, the contest is to be the first person to list the artist, song, and (listen closely) ALBUM in the comments. The winner will receive a partially chewed DVD case for the movie Brick. Courtesy of my dog Thena.

Good luck but I'll leave you with a hint. The song contains the lyrics: I always say I love you when I mean turn out the light, and I say let's run away when I just mean stay the night. Actually, they should have included the lyrics as they seem strangely appropriate.

The state of things

2006-10-04T00:00:00-05:00

It occurred to me this afternoon while reading this (warning popups) story about a father in Texas requesting that his daughter's school ban Fahrenheit 451 during National Banned Books Week that in this day and age making fun of ignorant local bumpkins can happen at internet speed.

Be forewarned backwards, racist, homophobic, religious fanatic creationists! Boing Boing will mock you mercilessly today, whereas even 5 years ago your incredibly poorly thought out and ironic requests that ran in your local newspaper would only get you mocked by your slightly more progressive local populace.

Now that this warning has gone out on my obscure blog on the internet I'm sure all sorts of NASCAR dads will take heed.

May cause "Poseidon Adventure" levels of drowsiness

2006-09-28T00:00:00-05:00

That's right, wrayblog has gone totally multimedia. I may never text blog again.

I know some (i.e. one) of you have been asking for more frequent posts. Lest you think I have been resting on my laurels I present to you the fruits of my past weeks labor. It doesn't look like much but I had to seperate 1:42 of wheat from about 90 minutes of chaff. That's the last time I let Uwe Boll direct my wedding video!

Enjoy the trailer for the movie event of summer (retroactively):

Wax sculpture humor is always funny

2006-09-23T00:00:00-05:00

It has been postulated that laughing is not a response to humor but rather a social communication to those around you that you find something funny, but in the category of things that make me laugh while sitting all alone on a Saturday morning this is right up there.

Telling detail: This is actually Billy Idol.

Let the Mighty Eagle(s) Soar!

2006-09-06T00:00:00-05:00

I know many of you are waiting with bated breath for the results so here they are:

Yes, Dr. Shaleah Jones coached the Wray High School Lady Eagles Volleyball C Team to victory over the Yuma High School Lady Indians Volleyball C Team.

While I'm sure Jeffrey can correct me with hundreds of examples I don't know of another Doctor/Coach in the realm of volleyball. Henceforth, Shaleah's nickname shall be Slash.

Please enjoy John Ashcroft:

Random Spin::Tapes 'n Tapes

2006-08-31T00:00:00-05:00

Apparently, some band from Minneapolis heard me disparaging American rock music and decided to take action. Wait, Minnesota is not in Canada is it? No? Alright! Thank you American Jesus. (Canadian Jesus, you had your chance.)

Whatever country this magical land composed entirely of lakes (from what I understand) is located they've finally returned fire in this northern border war that is indie rock music. If you read the Amazon reviews of this album you'll hear a lot of words like 'derivative' bandied about. Yes, Tapes 'n Tapes uses guitars, drums, and keyboards like many other bands out there but it doesn't necessarily make the music derivative. What I enjoy about many of these bands is that they take the traditional guitar, keys, drums paradigm and make something new and interesting out of it. Well, interesting at least. If it's not new that doesn't necessarily make it less enjoyable and The Loon qualifies as an enjoyable rock record.

My dog Thena absolutely loves it when I play air guitar to the bombastic off-kilter hook of 10 Gallon Ascots. The syncopated non-rhyming lyrics, marching cadence snare drum, and one-off harmony of a track like Omaha is not as easy to throw together as the guy sitting next to you in the Starbucks with Chucks, black t-shirt, and perma-frown would like you to believe on his blog. Lastly, it's just cool when on a track like The Illiad you take a straight-forward acoustic guitar strum and add what can only be described as a whooping crane playing a counter melody with the recorder you used in that excuse for an outfit that you called your 4th grade class "band."

Yeah, not all of the songs are eminently listenable but at least now Canada knows that our northern border is not just patroled by the musical equivalent of Barney Fife.

But if you squint you can see the leprechaun

2006-08-31T00:00:00-05:00

There is always a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow, right? But, as we all know you never see the end of a rainbow because rainbows are actually circles that you can only see half of because of the horizon blocking your view.

Here, however, I have incontrovertable proof that rainbows in Wray do have an end but, sadly, there is no pot of gold. Unless the asphalt is impregnated with gold! I'll let you know after I dig it up.

Se Wdding Phtos n flickr

2006-08-20T00:00:00-05:00

Here's the flickr link to our wedding and honeymoon photo set.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/shaleah_jones/ if the link above does not work for you.

These are not all of the photos so if you think you took a better picture (or you want a higher resolution copy) email shaleah(underscore)jones(at)yahoo(dot)com and we can send send you the 3500x2800 original.

My god, it's full of browsers!

2006-08-19T00:00:00-05:00

Exactly how big of a geek are you? Well, I have a 24 inch LCD flat panel that cost me more than a month's rent. Does that help?

Bask in the dual firefox glory...

I had to do this because my previous monitor lost the ability to display any color but orangeish-pink....THREE YEARS AGO. This way the slow DSL doesn't bother me so much because I just read one page while the other renders.

Dog on a blog

2006-08-19T00:00:00-05:00

I'll spare you the accompanying Sam Jackson expletive laden quote but I will give you pictures of our new dog. Her name is Athena (or 'thena for short). She is, of course, a little docile to be the Goddess of War.

When I gave her this name Shaleah was appalled but I was thinking of this passage from Neal Stephenson's Cryptonomicon

Instead of calling Athena the goddess of war, wisdom, and macrame, then, we should say war and technology. And here again we have the problem of an overlap with the jurisdiction of Ares, who's supposed to be the god of war. And let's just say that Ares is a complete asshole. His personal aides are Fear and Terror and sometimes Strife. He is constantly at odds with Athena even though--maybe because--they are nominally the god and goddess of the same thing--war. Heracles, who is one of Athena's human proteges, physically wounds Ares on two occasions, and even strips him of his weapons at one point! You see the fascinating thing about Ares is that he's completely incompetent. He's chained up by a couple of giants and imprisoned in a bronze vessel for thirteen months. He's wounded by one of Odysseus's drinking buddies during the Iliad. Athena knocks him out with a rock at one point. When he's not making a complete idiot of himself in battle, he's screwing every human female he can get his hands on, and--get this--his sons are all what we would today call serial killers. And so it seems very clear to me that Ares really was a god of war as such an entity would be recognized by people who were involved in wars all the time, and had a really clear idea of just how stupid and ugly wars are.

Whereas Athena is famous for being the backer of Odysseus, who, let's not forget, is the guy who comes up with the idea for the Trojan Horse. Athena guides both Odysseus and Heracles through their struggles, and although both of these guys are excellent fighters, they win most of their battles through cunning or (less pejoratively) metis. And although both of them engage in violence pretty freely (Odysseus likes to call himself 'sacker of cities') it's clear that they are being held up in opposition to the kind of mindless, raging violence associated with Ares and his offspring--Heracles even personally rids the world of a few of Ares's psychopathic sons. I mean, the records aren't totally clear--it's not like you can go to the Thebes County Courthouse and look up the death certificates on these guys--but it appears that Heracles, backed up by Athena all the way, personally murders at least half of the Hannibal Lecterish offspring of Ares.

So insofar as Athena is a goddess of war, what really do we mean by that? Note that her most famous weapon is not her sword but her shield Aegis, and Aegis has a gorgon's head on it, so that anyone who attacks her is in serious danger of being turned to stone. She's always described as being calm and majestic, neither of which adjectives anyone ever applied to Ares....

Now onto the pictures...

The first day of my (new ) life

2006-08-15T00:00:00-05:00

They're coming right for us.

2006-08-05T00:00:00-05:00

More pictures from our vacation/honeymoon in the San Juan islands. Why? I have to be near my computer pouring ice water directly onto the CPU to keep it from overheating anyway, might as well make myself useful.

"Apparently I read the New York Times, and I do the Sunday crossword in ink! Suck it!"

"Are you paddling at ALL?"

"If I can't see him then I haven't married him."

"These deer subsist only on Cheetos and Coca-Cola Blak."

Wed, Hot American Summer

2006-08-01T00:00:00-05:00

So the temperature was a record breaking 95 degrees fahrenheit in Seattle on the day of our wedding. That's why Charles C. Indoors, Eighth Duke of Northwestshropshamshire invented the environs that bear his name. It's true, I read it on the internet. New pictures as promised.

"It's a Shaleahclipse!"

"I am very excited about this Camelbak."

"That was totally worth the 18 mile hike...Straight Uphill...with no water."

Sleeping is giving in. No matter what they tell you.

2006-07-17T00:00:00-05:00

A couple of quick thoughts before the wedding:

If we had a poster for our wedding it would be this:

This is pretty cool sounding.

I'll see a good number of you in Seattle in a few days. I promise at least two good blog posts full of wedding pictures upon my return. And remember:

Teaching your children to be money conscious

2006-06-27T00:00:00-05:00

Here we see Natalie B.D. (before dime) above and A.D. (after dime) below. The only difference in the two pictures is that she appears to be symbiotically attached to an idiot in the second one.

See, she's fine!

"Here's a photo of me kicking your ass in D&D."

2006-05-26T00:00:00-05:00

Deep within the recesses of Dr. Babydoll labs we are breeding a nerd army to take over the world!

Why do deaf people hate plants?

2006-05-15T00:00:00-05:00

It was an interesting weekend on call. To wit, on Saturday night (nee Sunday morning) a very intoxicated person with a very intoxicated deaf friend came to the emergency department.

While the drunk patient turned out to be perfectly fine her intoxicated hearing impaired friend seemed to be competing for most emotionally distraught drunk acquaintence. In addition to literal wailing and gnashing of teeth at one point I returned to the nurses station to find the deaf friend removing the potting soil from a nearby bamboo plant and flinging it around the nurses station like a drunk, deaf, hysterical, sad Rip Taylor.

If you are already down to 5 senses don't impair the others with C₂H₆O.

Science geek porn (no pictures)

2006-05-15T00:00:00-05:00

When I was in undergrad at the esteemed Wayne State College (okay, you can stop laughing now), I would frequently sit in the library and read whatever I could find that interested me under the auspices of studying some boring chemistry text or other. Most of what I know about Linux is a result of those halcyon days but that is another (incredibly fucking boring) story altogether.

One of my favorite books from that time was Surely you're joking Mr. Feynman! I've always found scientists fascinating people but was never smart or patient enough to read their desiccated prose. Richard Feynman excluded.

If you're a science geek but aren't that smart (like me) you'll love Bill Bryson's A Short History of Nearly Everything. It's like the book version of the most absorbing A&E Biography you've ever seen except you'll learn more than your average episode about John Stamos.

Random Spin::Yeah Yeah Yeah's

2006-05-09T00:00:00-05:00

Listy List:

5 reasons Show Your Bones is not the album Fever to Tell was:

1.) Mixed with ProTools to have absolutely zero loud/soft dynamic. Get a producer!
2.) Is Brian Chase even playing the drums on this album?
3.) LL Cool J-esque lyrics include, "something like a phenomenon!"
4.) Nick Zinner, aren't you supposed to have the best guitar hooks in the world?
5.) They stole the guitar line for Way Out from the track Rich on Fever to Tell. (We weren't fooled because you changed to an acoustic guitar!)

5 reasons it's better:

1.) Wait a second. Did Fancy sound that much better on your third listen?
2.) Contains the lyrics: from up-a-bup-above.
3.) Alot fewer primal screams per track.
4.) If you play tracks 10,11,1 and 2 in that order you have the best EP released this year.
5.) Gold Lion's guitar riff will grace so many shoe commercials this year it will drive you completely bonkers.

Random Spin::Neko Case

2006-04-20T00:00:00-05:00

This post is not about cute babies but narcissism. My goal is to start writing here periodically, between posts about Shaleah and my friends' cute children, about music I love and why. Why should you care? Because if you're reading this it probably means you are one of three people: Shaleah, Matt Standridge, or my mother. Whoever you are prepare to be bored to tears because I'm writing about music and that's final!

This week's subject is Neko Case. Besides having the coolest name in all of music she is immensely talented. If you know of her at all it is probably as a member of The New Pornographers. Briefly, The New Pornographers are a Canadian indie rock supergroup whose members all release fantastic albums as solo artists and also get together to collectively put American music to shame every 6 months or so. The New Pornographers most recent album Twin Cinema is easily the best rock album released so far in 2006. For further proof of Canada's absolute music dominance over the United States see also Broken Social Scene, Feist, Metric, Stars, Wolf Parade and The Arcade Fire. That's seven bands off the top of my head that have no equal in American music. Oh, Canada, why must you repeatedly kick our asses with your indie rock? But I'm digressing. Back to the subject at hand.

If you are Shaleah you care about Neko Case because she was born in Tacoma, WA. If you are Matt Standridge you care about Neko Case because she has a song about John the Baptist on her amazing new album Fox Confessor Brings the Flood. If you are my mother you care about Neko Case because you enjoy reading whatever drivel your eldest son spills upon the internet. Anyway, if you're not familiar with Neko Case please feel free to listen to the track "Star Witness" here and consider buying her album. It is amazing and I highly recommend it.

"Star Witness" according to Ms. Case, is a song about the shooting of a young man in Chicago that she personally witnessed. While her lyrics are sometimes obtuse, if you listen closely it is actually a fairly coherent story about the incident. It just happens that the story is told in a tangential manner without actually mentioning much about the incident itself except for the line regarding "sirens" and the plea "don't let him die."

If you are not blown away by her amazing voice and writing talent I'll personally refund your money.*

Last but not least. If you like this album get your tickets now to see Neko perform at the Telluride Bluegrass Festival 6/15/06 along with Emmylou Harris.

Next week: Why the Yeah Yeah Yeah's new album is not the disappointment you thought it was.

(*Offer not valid in CO or NE)

Cool As Ice

2006-04-18T00:00:00-05:00

"Drop that zero, and get with the hero."

Is coconut cream pie a symbol of our cultural superiority?

2006-04-05T00:00:00-05:00

This month I'm reading Jared Diamond's Collapse. He argues that by learning from past society failures we can prevent our own extinction. Inherent in his argument is that past failed societies were neither blundering idiots begging to be disenfranchised and subjugated by other races; nor were they gentle, intelligent steward's that cared for the land they occupied like superbenevolent, vegan, eco-hippes. Rather, they were just regular idiots like us but without the benefit of the foreknowledge that comes with millenia of human existence.

Or maybe humans have only existed for 33,000 years?

Me? I think that our ability to create coconut cream pie is what sets us apart from indiginous peoples. Mmmmm....coconut.

What are they?

2006-03-31T00:00:00-06:00

Are they elephants? Are they seals? Why can't they make up their minds?

Elephant seals: Making a mockery of taxonomy since the dawn of the Holocene epoch!

Vishnu turns one.

2006-03-31T00:00:00-06:00

To quote the Bhagavad-Gita:

"I am become death, destroyer of worlds."

I will eat your souls! Or cake. Cake is alright too.

The Last Temptation of Matt

2006-03-30T00:00:00-06:00

Can a colicky baby turn a Protestant, nee Calvinist, into a Catholic mystic? Tune in next time to find out. Same flower time, same flower channel.

Wellcom tu Kaleforniah

2006-03-11T00:00:00-06:00

I'm not sure if you can tell what is going on in the crappy cellphone picture but as near as I can tell the sign used to say "Diamonds and Esmeralds." I guess someone pointed out that the sign was misspelled because the owner quickly corrected it with duct tape to read, "Diamonds and smeralds." Whew, that was a close one.

More vacations pics soon.

Olympic Fever!

2006-02-14T00:00:00-06:00

Do you have it? Seriously, Shaleah had it and she was incapacitated for a week. Then, she recovered long enough to snap and/or pose for these pictures. Infectious!

It's not that glamorous

2006-01-27T00:00:00-06:00

Despite what you might have heard it's not all that glamorous living in Wray.

Put on your crash helmet

2006-01-17T00:00:00-06:00

I'm going on a blogging binge after being away for so long. With pickaxes!

I'm Fabulous

2005-12-07T00:00:00-06:00

Do these horizontal stripes make me look fat?

Touchdown!

2005-12-01T00:00:00-06:00

I'm rechristening this the "roof is on fire" sign. Hey Ladies! (cowbell...etc).

It's getting hot in here. So fix my rotator cuff.

Is there impingement syndrome in the hizzouse?

Thanks Up-to-Date, you're hilarious.

Lifesize diorama

2005-11-28T00:00:00-06:00

I finally had a busy weekend on call and Wray had it's first storm of the year. Shaleah and I are engaged and I miss her a lot today. So I'm sitting here in clinic listening to my Happy Thanksgiving to me CD's and composing a collection of pictures that illustrate happier times with Shaleah...and Natalie....and Jack.

It's a twofer.

2005-11-16T00:00:00-06:00

Long time no blog. I've been busy getting settled in out here and being on call. Also, whenever I turn the microwave on my computer shuts off so I haven't been blogging very much. I have been cooking delicious meals instead. Here are some pictures of me cooking eggplant parmagiana and of Shaleah and Natalie at the residency retreat.

Soul on Ice

2005-11-02T00:00:00-06:00

Could Natalie be a Black Panther? Damning photographic evidence from early in her career. But where's the beret?

All Hallow's Eve

2005-10-31T00:00:00-06:00

Who's a scary goblin? Are you a scary goblin? 'Es you is. You is a scary gobbly-wobbly. Oh god, stop gnawing on my leg! Oh the humanity!

Maybe happy isn't the mood for you.

2005-10-28T00:00:00-05:00

Here's a picture of me looking tired as usual. I'd like to thank Ernie Castro, MD for driving another c-section 30 minutes my way from Yuma, CO. Ernie, I hope you got to drive the ambulance on the way back and they let you play with the siren. In the future try to get your OB's to crash in the middle of the day.

7 days until I get to see Shaleah.

It's all gonna break

2005-10-27T00:00:00-05:00

Here's a slightly blurry but nonetheless beautiful Wray, CO sunset sky. My refrigerator is only slightly less empty today but my apartment is no more clean and I really miss Shaleah. I'm trying to be optimistic but eight months is a long time. Sometimes it's like that.

Jack says hello.

2005-10-26T00:00:00-05:00

Didactics this afternoon and Jack made a nice sign for his unofficial aunt to read over the television. When asked whether auntie Shaleah was nice Jack shook his head emphatically yes.

It's Nate-tastic

2005-10-25T00:00:00-05:00

Here we see Nate in his natural habitat. He helped with this morning's c-section by drawing me some flashcards. I gave the flashcards to a monkey and I ate breakfast while the monkey first-assisted on the c-section. Thanks OR monkey!

Hello Desk!

2005-10-25T00:00:00-05:00

Here we see my desk in Wray before it becomes hopelessly clogged with overdue charts. My desk is clean. The same cannot be said for my apartment and I'm not sure I'm going to get it clean anytime soon so here is a picture of me in my kitchen where I have no silverware but nothing is cluttered.

Orientation is boring

2005-10-24T00:00:00-05:00

It would seem that all of the people that were supposed to orient me to the hospital today are on vacation. So I have ample time to sit at my new desk and blog. I have some pictures of my desk that I'll post later but mostly I've just been signing things for hospital priviledges and reading up for my c-section tomorrow. The Wray Health Fair is tonight and everyone has to attend so I guess I'll be manning a booth.

Moving in

2005-10-24T00:00:00-05:00

Moved to Wray, CO this weekend and I plan to blog my experiences because I'm incredibly vain. No, actually this blog is only for close friends and family and mostly for Shaleah to view pictures I take. The above is of her since I don't have any Wray pictures yet and I'm too lazy to post anything else.